Dysphoria (bxb)

Prologue

Here I am sitting in my studio type apartment, my mind is blank and i don't feel anything. Basically i feel empty.

Every day works the same for me, i go to school, people stares at me, i can see how they are disgusted at me. All of my professor does not take me seriously. I can hear how they blatantly say mean things at me.

*flashback*

I was so lost in my own world during my International law class, currently drawing some unnecessary things that is not related with my chosen subject.

Suddenly my professor told me to stand up, obviously noticing my lack of focus on his subject.

"Mr. Hrdina is the issue of Trump recognizing Jerusalem as the capital of Israel an International criminal law?"

"Uhm...uhmmm I don't think so sir" i nervously answered him, just wanting to end this because of all the stares and the silent giggles that i got from my classmates, i feel so ashamed of myself.

"Hmm, okay. Explain why you don't think Trump recognizing Jerusalem as the capital of Israel not a International Criminal law?" He countered.

Because of the giggles and the stares that i got from my classmates, my mind went blank and does not notice the second question from my professor.

"Mr. Hrdina are you listening to me? You seem out of focus? Be focused next time or else!" He shouted at my face his anger is very evident.

What did i do wrong to experience such humiliation. All i did was that i didn't answer his question, he's not like this to his students, only to me.

Why? Because I'm different from his students? I'm weird? And Gay?

*end of flashback*

My minds does not stop from wandering from all of the things that happened to me all this years.

I feel so empty yet so full. Empty because it just is and full because of all the hatred to all the people that has done mean things to me and to myself. Because if I am not like this, this gay boy that I've become there's is no humiliation and judging to be experience. And will all these feelings that i have right now, my body just want to explode.

Now, here I am holding a blade, ready to end my useless life.

Then suddenly...

*BANG!!!*

The door crashed open and revealing a young man i did not recognize.

"I know what you're trying to do. Just please stop, let's talk about it, this is not the last thing to resort your problem, ending your life is not and option." He nervously said to me

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?! I'M TIRED AND I JUST WANT TO END THIS! THE HELL YOU CARE, NOT EVEN MY PARENTS CARED ABOUT ME" shouting at him while sobbing so hard.

"It doesn't matter who I am" he said and the next thing he said to me gave chills to my spine.

"I'm trying to save you, I want to save you"

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Hello there guys! So my name is Bayani. This is my first story in wattpad and hope you guys support it.

I'm so sorry for the wrong spelling and the grammatical errors. I dont even know some of the words but it felt just right. Anyway, thanks for reading.