imagines

TOM HOLLAND

And again, and again and again. And until they were alone in their bed, falling asleep in each other's arms.

'Cause I gave (I gave) My heart (my heart) To a goddamn fool I gave him everything. Now there's nothing left for you 'Cause I gave (I gave) My heart (my heart) To a goddamn fool. I lost everything. And I have nothing left for you. Oh, I have nothing left for you.

"Y/N, is everything okay?" Tom asked, rubbing her back and playing with her hair. Y/N's head was on his chest, her eyes barely open and her mind hardly awake.

"Hmm?" Her eyes opened just a bit, but she didn't move. Tom sighed and Y/N felt like she needed to be fully awake for this conversation. It was going to get bad.

She sat up, so did Tom. Their backs were against the headboard, while Tom kept his eyes on her and she kept her gaze on her lap.

"What's bothering you?" He asked, genuinely concerned. He was worried he had done something wrong. "Have I done something wrong? You've been off ever since therapy today. Correct me if I'm wrong, but you usually bounce back after about an hour."

"No. No, you're right." She nodded. She still kept her eyes on her lap, "It's just what you said earlier. . ."

Tom furrowed his eyebrows, "What did I say— Oh no, when I told them that you sleep in your slippers? Love, we were just teasing you."

"No, Tom!" Y/N finally snapped. She didn't care that Harry and Haz were teasing her about her slippers and how she wore them to bed when she was super cold. She didn't fucking care. Tom jumped, startled by her outburst. "I don't fucking care about the slippers, okay?!"

She stood up, ripping herself away from her loving boyfriend. He stood up too, walking around the bed to stand near her. He didn't want to get too close, in fear of scaring her. No, he never wanted to do that.

She pulled her hands up to her face, shaking. "I-I-I don't even know where this is going, Tom."

"Love. . . What do you mean?" He asked softly. His mind was running a mile a minute but he didn't want it to show.

"Tom, you're in-fucking-love with me!" She screamed and threw her hands down. He stepped closer, only a bit though, and she stepped back. His face fell and she saw, but didn't let it show that she cared.

"Of course I am, darling." He nodded anyways, "Why don't you come here and we can talk about this, calmly?"

She shook her head, tears welling in her eyes. He tried stepping to her again, she didn't move, so he placed his hands onto her arms in a loving manner. She screamed, "No, no! Get off of me!"

He obeyed, immediately dropping his hands and stepping back, like she had burst into flames. "Y/N, darling, if you want to go back and forget what I said, we can. We can wait until your ready."

"No! No, we can't! Because it's already out! You won't get me to say it. You won't!" She pointed at him, her tears falling rapidly, his too. He loved her, so much. He hated seeing her like this. He hated what that asshole did to her. God, he loved her so much.

She continued, screaming, "I'm not something you can fix! Can't you see that I'm a product of my own past? Tom, this isn't going to last, I'm going to end up alone!"

He shook his head, "No, no, love, you won't. I'll be here. I'll help you, you're gonna get past this. I promise you."

He walked over to her again and wrapped his arms around her, she thrashed around in his hold, sobbing. Y/N fell to the floor, dragging Tom with her. She finally calmed her body and leaned her head against his chest, crying loudly. Tom held the breaking girl, whispering sweet nothings to her.

No. You won't hear me say those words again. This is something that you cannot mend. Can't you see I am a product of my own past? So I know this will never last. And I will cover your fears. I will not pick up your tears. I'll live out the rest of my days alone.

After awhile, Y/N's and Tom's cries had quieted down, they just sat in each other's arms. Somewhere in the time of sitting with each other they both realized something.

Tom realized how much he loved her. He realized how hard it was to love her. He realized he loved a broken girl. And most importantly, he realized that he would stick by the broken girl until the day he died.

Y/N realized two things. She realized that she was completely complicated and tough to crack. But boy was she lucky to have someone willing to help her through it. Sure, that didn't mean she was instantly cured from the depths of her own mind, but it sure did help to know she wasn't alone.

And in that time, she realized her fear. She was terrified that she wouldn't ever love again. God, did she want to. She wanted to love Tom, so badly. She was just scared. Scared to love, scared to let go, scared to jump in again. But she was determined to try, and if that's all she could do, she'd be okay. She just wanted to try.

'Cause I gave my heart to a goddamn fool. I gave him everything. Now there's nothing left for you. 'Cause I gave my heart to a goddamn fool. I lost everything and I have nothing left for you.

_______
happy new years, loves!
hows your new year going? good i hope! did anyone go to the ace comic con to see/meet tom, laura, and jacob? i didn't! i wish i would've though, maybe next time though. all the people that did are super lucky tho LOL i heard that hes even sweeter in person and i honestly expected nothing less

LOL anyways i hope u enjoyed!

love ya! (: