Why didnt I just tell you from the start ??

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Often in life you say the wrong thing at the wrong time
Not me
I told her, Finally
After a couple of months I thought I could handle you and him
Nope
Hearing how you spoke about him
Hearing how he made you feel

I could be happy for you
I did try
Honestly I did
I even met him
But everyday you were with him was another day you were not with me
I thought I lost a friend the day you told you were with him
Feeling the harsh kick of reality drag you back into the real world

So I told you
It felt like the right thing to do
Even if it did confuse Esme
I had to do it
I could keep my feelings inside anymore

The way the corner of your mouth lifted into a smile when I told you
Is there a better feeling ??
But you had a boyfriend
And I had just told you how I feel
I feel guilty for it
Even now

Even now 4 months later I feel guilty

But then I look up and I see what I have and how I'm never gonna look at anyone the same way again

It feels good
It feels healthy
It feels right

Why didn't I just tell you at the start??

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