play song
For slowtownsam
I was shaking.
And She was here, crammed with myself into a small bathroom.
She was here.
I was cutting her hair.
She was here.
The tile was cold , but for some reason, this time I could ignore it.
"make me a promise right now"
The device in my hand was foreign.
"as soon as we meet, i want you to shave my head. like a buzz cut. "
I couldn't decide if my hands were shaking as much as the device, or more.
"just know, if it happens, know you are shaving my head"
And I made a promise, the day of my birth, in the year 2017.
When I had buzzed the first section, I sucked in a breath, weighing the magnitude of this moment.
My lips briefly touched the freshly cut hair, for just a second, before the space grew between them again.
When she stiffened, I almost regretted the action, but it said more than I could with words.
It spoke of new beginnings. Of brighter days and the sun kissing her skin. The gesture meant I was there, and she was there, and it always has been, and always will be that way. Because I loved her, and she loved me. We were sisters, and not in a cliche.
Because if we could break the distance, we could do anything.
So as I shaved, and shook, and held my breath when I felt a tear drop on the top of my foot, I prayed.
For strength
when I had to bring her to the airport days later
For my friend
that she would never doubt the love towards her
For courage
to face every day to come.
And as the hair dropped to the floor, mixing with tears, I saw her for who she was.
My friend. A girl who had too many people leave her.
My friend. A girl who was as beautiful as the sun on autumn leaves.
My friend. A girl I wished could see herself through my eyes.
My friend. A girl who's mind wasn't going to be allowed to attack her anymore.
My friend. A girl who's strength rivaled even the mightiest of soldiers.
My friend. A girl who was as stunning as the moon filtering through trees.
My friend-
My sister. A girl I would never leave.
And as she looked in the mirror, after all silent vows were made, and chains were broken, I smiled to her with watered eyes.
She always said I saw things differently, but the truth is, I saw her.
