CEM MIB ~Secrets & Lies

Dark Mirrors

Uncomfortable beyond measure, Amanda moved a smidge away from Avi but only a smidge. It wasn't enough. He'd have experienced some measure of happiness if she was in Tin Buck Two and he wasn't.

"Are you okay?" Amanda whispered beside him. He didn't even bother with turning his head in her direction again.

"Not really. I don't want to talk about it." He turned to face her then quickly  turned away. For a brief moment, his eyes met and held hers, begging her to just shut-up and go away. They said the words he had not spoken. He didn't want to talk to her about it. He didn't want to talk to her. Amanda didn't know how to handle his rejection. It stung her a lot more than she would let him know. She forged ahead trying to bring Avi out of the funk he had obviously fallen into. She did what she always did. She engaged him a conversation that revolved around her and her memories of their time together in high school.

Avi did his best to play along, but the whole undercurrent of it all not only bored him but made him extremely angry as he heard Rayne's words form in his mind. She was right. He hated it. He felt his heart sink a little lower than the bottom of his feet.

Avi found himself alone in a room full of people, isolated and empty with an old friend, a beautiful woman at his elbow. There had been a time when she piqued his interest. A time when he let curiosity stand in the place of reason, a time when he let her hands wander over his body. It excited him and filled him with desire. There was a time when he explored her body and they both enjoyed it, but that was a long time ago. Long before he met Rayne. His heart broke at every word she said that he didn't hear. He just wanted out of there, away from all the people that wore on his soul and stole the energy he didn't have. He wanted to get away from the facts that he hadn't shared with Rayne. Facts that he suspected she knew anyway. He wanted to be out among the trees, feeling the cool evening air upon his skin, flowing through his hair and then to feel nothing at all. He was drowning in pain. He didn't want to hurt anymore.

Rayne hadn't shown up yet. She was supposed to be there and so was Mel. He hadn't officially met her. He supposed he never would. More hurt filled his empty spaces. He wondered if Rayne would bother with the rest of the event. He felt the space his heart she once occupied empty a bit more than fill with hurt. He fought back the tears brought on by the pain at the thought that she might have packed up and left. Leaving him behind to hurt more than he ever knew he could, left him for good. When he left the bathroom, her bag was gone. She left only the key card for his room and the guitar he had given her for their anniversary that year. It was still in his room. He could barely contain the tears.

Amanda was talking, but he couldn't be bothered to pay attention. Rayne had entered the room. She was a vision in black and green, the green that matched his tie. His heart sank. He wanted to pull his eyes away from the radiant beauty that his former girlfriend was as she entered the room with her best friend Mel in an equally elegant crushed velvet and satin black and red gown but he could not. Rayne was the most radiant being in all the room. She always would be to him. No matter where she was she always would. An usher greeted the ladies at the door to guide them to their table. He stood awaiting her arrival and only remembered when it was too late that he was sitting at the wrong table. He watched in horror and embarrassment as his heart moved gracefully to her table and was seated next to a man he did not know. To cover the awkwardness of his mistake he excused himself from the table. Alone, secured in the locked bathroom stall he let the tears fall.

***

She watched his eyes leap to her as she and Mel entered the room. He had not seen the gown that she had promised would delight him. Apparently, it did. He did not meet her eyes, couldn't any more than she could his least they forget that they weren't together anymore. She hoped he missed the little touch of arrogant pride that she felt at being able to pull his attention so clearly away from everyone around him especially that red headed bitch that sat so arrogantly next to him looking smug like she won some trophy. Avi was no trophy. He was a man a beautiful and elegant man with a heart so strong and pure that it rivaled the gates of heaven and the angels themselves. Her heart sank to the seventh level of hell. Had she really walked away from him? She was honestly surprised when the usher didn't take her to his table, then that slow empty feeling crept back into her soul. It occupied the place that Avi once did. Instead of filling her with the love and light that he brought into her would, it left her feeling small, cold and empty. The kind of cold that you couldn't cure if you flew into the sun. She cast her eyes to the table and let Mel take over the conversations. Mel knew her story just as well as she did. Plus, she had an entirely different perspective. It hadn't happened to Mel. It happened to her friend.