Chapter one
I feel empty, lonely, different and maybe even changed all because of one single stupid boy. I've wrote about this before but it just keeps getting worse. Let's start from the beginning of grade eight. Grade eight was a crazy hectic year for all of us, we were all slowly finding ourselves and people started to show their real colours.
At the start of the year Kai and I decided to start off fresh since the year before he had "hated" each other and were in different classes at the start. Everyday we would facetime, skype, call and text for hours on end. I would always tell him how our language teacher Mr. J, was so cool and how we talked about a lot of ethnicity issues. He would tell his dad how he wanted to be in our class because most of his good friends were in the class and how mr. J taught material he could relate to. He started to talk to a few teachers about it, so he could transfer and sure enough he did.
At the time i had just broken up w my ex George and was out of the county for a wedding with my mother. It was late at night and Kai was asking how it was going, we started to text about my past relationship with George, and how it really wasn't anything serious. I didn't really care that it was over if anything i was more than happy that it was. Somehow we got to the topic of who we like in our school, of course i tell him that i liked him. So now we are having this crazy conversation of how we like each other and how we have since the year before.
The day i got back we had decided that we were gonna go for it and just date, it was sept 26. We didn't really say anything to anyone because we were known for hating each other, and we were still in different classes. It was really awkward at the start of the relationship but from that point on, it just kept getting better.
Chapter Two
The last day before the winter break, Kai and I have been together for three months now. Since it was the last day Kai and I were giving our gifts, he got me a super cute polar bear stuffed animal, and I got him a nice snap back hat. It was a regular school day except the afternoon, it was our school dance.
It was fun because I didn't have to work they had a different crew on. Many slow songs and kisses later, Kai asks me to go into our drama/dance room. In this room Kai asks me to turn around and close my eyes. As i stand there he turns me around and pulls out a ring, not just any ring but a cute little promise ring with a heart. I stand there looking at it as he promises me that he will never look at another girl the way he looks at me and that we will always talk things out. In that moment i knew i never wanted to let him go. I don't think I've been happier.
The day end any we sit in the foyer together like usual and i just keep think about how much he means to me. My dad texts me like usual about how he's here to pick me up, I get up and we say our goodbyes for the winter break. As soon as the school is out of site and Kai can no longer see my car he starts texting me how much he already misses me. Days feel like years without him.
Back at school after new years I see and i just want to kiss him, so i do and every time i do i feel a spark. I was happy..... Too happy. I had a feeling that wasn't good be cause what goes up must go down. That thing that felt like it was 1000ft in the air and dropped to the deep sea was my heart. I feel it shatter he doesn't even have to say anything to me except "are you okay?". What am i supposed to say "No i'm not"? Of course not I was too broken to shed a tear. I stand there as he leaves and i just break. I call his locker partner to put the ring back in the locker, but instead i decided to tie it to the lock.
Chapter 3
A month goes by and it's a rough time let me tell you. Still. Feeling. Broken. My friend Angelo was there for me, since my other friends didn't want to help. He liked me at one point in time. We work together at the school, we are pretty close. He starts to give me a bit more attention and i find myself liking him a bit to be honest. I start thinking well I gotta get over Kai sometime. The last monday of the month rolls around and it's drama club or as I call it the club of disaster I'm working in the tech room like usual, no one's around I like it like that it gives me time to be alone. I go into the studio to get everyone. Everyone leaves except Kai, being the little bugger he is he takes my sunglasses. I of course try to get it back so now I look stupid running around like a wild goose running after him. He stops and hides in the tech room. I find him, and he holds the glasses over top of his head so I start jumping. All of a sudden i find his lips on mine and I feel a sense of togetherness again. I feel a big smile creep on my face as he asks "Do you want to still be together?". I just stand there and nod my head cause I'm just speechless. He kisses me more and all of a sudden my friend Blair walks in and starts running around screaming something about how Kai and I are back together. I thought I cared about what everyone was going to think, but i didn't. I just knew I was happier.
The weeks go on and everything is great, except the fact that I kept worrying that I had very slight feelings for Angelo. He kept calling every other day and when we said bye he'd send me hearts. I talked with Ms. White during the dance and I didn't know what to do. She said that I should go for both of them, but I knew better than that. I would never do that to Kai. So I said something, I told him "I have feelings for Angelo and I don't want to mess anything up between us".
The tears trickle down my face and onto his shirt as he holds me tight. He looks into my eyes and wipes away the tears. He pulls me in closer and hugs me tight and says "I'll always be here for you".
I just sat in the hallway with Angelo, as he comforts me. We didn't do anything just sat there. Eventually my friends found me and we walked around the school I got juice, I started feeling better. I get back in the dance and a slow song comes on I had no one to dance with. Ms. White says to dance with Reed. I didn't mind but it was kinda awkward.
After the dance I go home, then the dance studio to get my mind off things. After class I see that I have a notification from Angelo. He asked if I wanted to "hang out". I said yes without thinking about the consequences. He started to say things to make a girl feel wanted. I don't even know why I said yes, I guess I was still getting over Kai even though I had him back.
Valentine's day rolls around and i wake up to a text from Angelo that saying how beautiful, talented and amazing I am. A few days later I had basketball practice, I was going over to Angelo's after. He picked me up after practice with George to go back to his place. There were so many thoughts and emotions going through my body and mind. What happened at that house stays unsaid... for now.
The next day we're woking like usual and all of a sudden out of the blue he says that he doesn't want a relationship. I didn't start crying over Angelo, I started crying because I let go of Kai. How could I be so stupid.
