Again

The rhythmical beat of the wheels hit the tracks like an endless song. Playing on repeat; non stop as the train traveled through the tunnel. The occasionally movement caused me to loose my spot as I read. I kept the book upward, covering my face from the incoming passengers passing through.

I glance around as I sat uncomfortably on the hard seat waiting for my usual stop. I grasp the edges tightly. Despite the corners of the book digging in my skin.

Few people came in before the last bell rang. A little girl bumped into me as her mother and her hurried inside. She looks at me before she is forcefully pulled to her mother's side following along to the next cart.

Nonchalantly I look down and ignore the distinct chattering.

Once again I open my book and try to concentrate.

With one more distraction, the doors are hauled open with a bag caught in between. I sigh this time not daring to look up. I was going nowhere with so much distraction happening and it wasn't going to keep me form reading a James Patterson love story. That recently captivated me to read the book.

From my peripheral vision, a disembodied figure sat on the empty seat in across of me.

I flip page feeling the delicateness of the paper, I felt like I was being watched.

Carefully, I peer above the pages. Feeling a bit awkward, the guy sitting in front stares back.

Without hesitation I look down and read. Or at least I try to.

I pretend to read, trying to examine each word across the pages.

My eyes focuses on love. I cringe just to even look at it. I don't believe in love or even the least idea of it. It only exists in stories and should at least stay that way. With all of its lovey dovey stuff and its cliche happily ever after.

Yet still, I liked to read about it, liked the fact that in a book love seems so real and pure. That in any moment it will swoop you off you feet and in the arms of prince charming.

What am I thinking. There's no such thing!

Still trying to redirect my attention on the book, I can feel his eyes shooting glaring bullets at me, I can even imagine myself bleeding out a nervous breakdown. I can feel the sweat building on my forehead.

I rise the book closer to my face trying not to make it too obvious that I'm avoiding him. An elderly man sitting next to me, gives me a questioning look. I didn't care that I somehow looked like a fool, but I smile to him anyways and look directly back at the book.

Finally giving up, I sit the book down on my lap.

From the corner of my eyes I glare at the floor nervously. I glance at the edge of his worn out oxfords. The hem of his tight brown pants rolled up only a bit above his shoes. His light cardigan just melted along his lanky body perfectly. Underneath he wore rippled The Smiths t-shirt.

I'll give him props for that.

His spidery fingers held on to his old ipod.

The brown curls of his hair hung around his ears and forehead, giving him a slight look of a greaser back from the sixties yet with a classic wild look.

The train finally comes to a stop, my stop.

I glance up one more time. For a reason I felt myself blush as I catch him staring at me. I swiftly pass by, trying to avoid him. I place my things inside my satchel.

The crisp cold air hits my face as I step out of the train station. I wrap my scarf around my neck and walk along the pavement. The coolness reach my fingers up to my nose as I walk to the bus stop.

Just as I thought I had gotten rid of him. The guy from the train stands in my same stop. I sigh deeply and rest my hands in my pockets.

An awkward silence soon grew mixed in with the loud madness of Brooklyn.

He taps his foot as he sightly nods his head, I could hear his music on full blast. I knew that specific voice well, Metallica. He takes a pack of cigarettes from his pockets and for moment as if in doubt, he takes a second before he extends one to me.

"Want one?"

"No, thanks"

"Huh," he takes off his earphones, "what?"

"I said no thanks" I say more forcefully, "I actually plan to live a long life" I mutter,

"What?"

"Nothing." I say, getting a bit annoyed with this guy.

The bus finally arrives, "Like your shirt by the way." I say before almost running my way to the back.

I stare in surprise as he places his messenger bag down as he sits next to me.

"Are you following me?" I finally say,

He looks up, his eyelashes in a instant brightens up his light brown eyes. I try not to look but it is impossible for me to look away.

"Me following you?" He chuckles,

"um yeah" I retort

"No, like every other person in the city. I'm trying to get home," his eyes met mine, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

I gaze at my worn out boots, trying to keep my eyes preoccupied. I felt stupid.

"so, you like The Smiths" he continues

I didn't answer, I didn't have the guts to.

"hmm well they are pretty good,...so where your headed?"

I ignored him.

"...what's your favorite song of The Smiths?" he still didn't shut up. I look at the window trying to pretend I didn't hear him.

I look around once more still avoiding him. I sigh, "Well this is my stop," I say, trying to be polite. I don't look at him, I get up as soon the bus stops.

"Bye" I hear his voice behind me.

A new wave of relief hit me as I made my way out the bus. For some reason I couldn't stand him, he was absolutely getting on my last nerves, I don't why but I just felt I needed to leave.

~~~~~

I make my way into the apartment on the eight floor.

The stained grubby walls gave the apartment a depressing feel to it especially with the faded beige carpet that seemed to have been in the apartment since the twenties. I walked among the silent the halls as I reach the door.

My hands shakes uncontrollably as I unlocked the front lock.

"Florenceeee" a elongated yell comes from the living room, in a instant a smile forms my lips. As soon as I place my things down, loud footsteps immediately followed by running echos down the hall. Daniel rushes in.

"Hold on, big man" I smile, Daniel waited eagerly as I search through my bag. "hurry, hurry" he jumps, his bright brown eyes seem to gleam excitedly.

I had gone to the store right after school to get Daniel a special gift since I promised him I would if he passes his major test in school, "here" The lightly packaged toy is yanked from my hand

"This is awesome"

"And this means I will be expecting good grades from your report card okay?"

"Yeah, yeah" he nods, his full attention on the transformer toy.

"Where's dad?"

"I don't know" he runs off to his room

The carpet felt so heavenly as I take my boots off revealing my bare feet. Each step I take, I glance around the two room apartment.

Light shined underneath a closed door,

"Dad" I whisper,

No response.

I knock on the door softly. The door already cracked open, opens slightly as I press my fingers on the door knob.

Sitting on top of the closed toilet, he wipes his eyes with the edge of his sleeve as he tried to cover his face, leaning far away from me.

"Dad?"