Old Copy of The Suicide Pact

Chapter One: Ashley

The autumn leaves fell ever so gently as I anxiously made my way home. I had no idea what I was going to tell her, no idea how she was going to react. It had been six years since this has happened in our perfect little family. To distract myself from the fear, I listened to the crunch and crackle of the dead leaves underfoot. Every step I took was one step closer to dishonoring my family. I was officially a disappointment. After delaying my trip for as long as I could, I carefully made my way up the stairs to my front porch and perfected the hem on my private school uniform. I had to at least look like I had my life together. Deep breaths Ashley, deep breaths.

I slowly opened the front door and swallowed as I listened to the click and clack of my heels on the marble floors.

"Miss. Ashley?" I turned around to face the family butler, Austin. "May I take your bag?"

I put on a fake smile and handed my tote to him. "Thank you."

"Of course, Miss." He went to place my bag on the designated hook in the mudroom. I raced to my room, aware that I only had a few short minutes before the eruption of anger. I took a glance at my violin, and then at my laptop. I desperately wanted to write, but I knew that I needed to suck up to my mother so I picked up the instrument and began playing a flawless edition of Fur Elise.

"Ashley, Darling, that sounds lovely!" My mother obviously hasn't searched for my report card yet so I decided not to mention it. If she hadn't emailed my headmaster multiple times in the last week to see when they were coming home, I would have hidden it. Unfortunately, that's not how it worked. I decided to place all of my focus on the song. Every stroke of my bow, and every flick of my finger released a beautiful note that I imagined was carrying each one of my worries away.

My beautiful melody was interrupted by a knock on the door. "Come in!" I called.

Austin opened the door and gave me an sorry look. "Miss, your mother is asking for you."

"Oh God." He smiled and gave me a apologetic pat on the back as I walked past him. The trip down the mahogany staircase was a short one, and once I reached the bottom I was faced by my mother.

"What is this?" Before now, she had always looked at me like I was an object. Like I was something she owned and could control. Now, she glared at me like I was a cockroach, a disgusting little pest she just wanted to be rid of.

"Mom, I'm so sorry!" I tried to fight back the tears. The last thing I wanted was for her to think I was looking for pity. I was, but I didn't need her knowing that.

"I don't understand." She threw the paper onto the ground. "You are not my daughter. My daughter is smart, and perfect. You are a disgrace"

I stared down at the letter C on the crumpled report card. Tears fell onto the sheet, and my mother left me to my hysterics. I can't handle this anymore. I have to get out of here. I grabbed a pair of shoes off of the rack next to the door and left. Even though it took me twenty minutes to get to my destination, I hadn't calmed down a bit. I was hoping he was there. I needed him to be there.

The grove of trees surrounding the old barn was very thick. To anyone passing by, it may appear to be any old forest. There were many trees, a few oaks and many pines. This wasn't a rare sight in Hackson. If a maple tree was found that was strange, but oaks and pines were everywhere. I always loved the way these trees towered over our small town. Sometimes, I would pretend I was one of them and nothing could touch me. I was free.

As I approached the barn, I realized I wasn't alone. The door was cracked open and I could see someone moving around in the hay loft. I wiped my face, not wanting Ravyn or Hudson to see me in tears. Anyone else, I would've been fine, just not them. They weren't the touchy feely type. Pushing the door open further, I listened to the frantic rustling above me. "Noah?" My throat was a little raw from all of my crying. The movement stopped. "Noah?" I asked again, I was hoping it was him but I wasn't sure.