secure ✰ m.c.

1

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

4am. Another round of chimes bellowing from a Grandfather clock. They fueled my inability to sleep next to him again.

I turned my head to the left, finding Michael in the same position he was an hour ago; sleeping soundly on his stomach. His hand would softly brush my shoulder every so often. I sighed at the touch, looking back up to the dark ceiling. I gripped tighter onto the white sheets that wrapped around my bare body.

Tonight, I had seen Michael for the first time in 8 months at my mother's wedding. After my constant attempts to ignore his deep stare drilling into my back, I eventually gave into those emerald eyes. We slowed dance to "Goodnight Moon", tearily confessing to each other during the second chorus that we in fact had not lost feelings for one another. We left the wedding together, meeting at his new home. It took only an hour for his lips to find their way back onto me.

I sat up in his bed, peering around and taking in the unfamiliar bedroom. Michael had finally found his own place and was an hour away from his grandmother. I had unfortunately lived with my parents during our long break, as I was constantly jumping from job to job and couldn't get settled. The constant failure of house hunting was a heavy weight to carry, but luckily I had finally signed a contract for my own home on the other side of town. I was moving in next week.

I pulled the sheets gently from under Michael. I froze as he began to stir around. All night I had anxiously awaited that conversation, since it had barely came up. We skipped over what happened, how we coped, and skipped right to the part of confessing our love as I mentioned. We left it at that after we finished that dance on the beach. I knew that I didn't have the right words to say to him.

I searched around his floor, using the moon through his blinds as my light. I tip-toed to the side next to his bed, picking up the button up shirt he had worn tonight. I slipped in on as I dropped the sheet, buttoning it up halfway. I exited his cold and quiet room and headed towards his bathroom.

I tiptoed down the stretched hallway in his home, worrying that I would wake him. I grabbed the cold silver handle and pushed the door open slowly. I cringed at the high pitched squeaks from the hinges, slowly making my way in. I flipped on the light, instinctively rubbing my eyes from the sudden brightness. Or even possibly from my lack of sleep. 

I studied my reflection as my eyes adjusted, noting my messy state. My makeup was beginning to smear and my hair was beyond a fixable state. I shook my head and turned from my reflection. I huffed my fallen bangs from my eyes, leaving over to turn on the faucet. I grabbed my hair once I made my way back to meet my reflection, shaking it out and wrapping it in a bun. 

Steam crept onto the large mirror. Even though the haze began to blur my view, I could still see the door next to me gently being pushed open. I pulled pieces down as Michael's reflection appeared behind me. He leaned in the doorway frame and studied me, arms crossed over one another.

"Morning," he mumbled, giving me a faint smile. I noticed his droopy eyes, it was evident that he had just woken up. That had been the first word to come out of his mouth.

"Morning?" I repeated questionably. I let my arms fall to my side after the knot on my head was done. "It's barely 4 o'clock." I quietly laughed, watching him through the mirror. He looked down, his smile growing once his eyes reached the ground.

He took a step towards me, his arms now loosely draped around my waist. His chin settled on top of my head. My smile fell at the memory of how easy this all used to be, him and I. Now it seemed different.