The Summer of Forever- Sequel to This kid, Nicky

I did'nt have the pride to go to the pond that Thursday. I did drive by to see if for some twisted reason Nicky was there, waiting. He was'nt. I have never been heartbroken before but I think that moment is the clostest I've ever come. I never knew how close Nicky was to me. I guess I did spend 6 hours a week with him, I all the sudden felt a big unhealable hole.

It's been 3 months since that day I saw Nicky drive away. It's the first day of summer now and I am clueless. Everyday has gotten worse and worse. I have let some of my closest friend slip away from me, my family has been concered but they didn't know about Nicky. For some reason I never opted to tell them. He was my special little secret. I thought a few times of going up to Aniston to see him play but I didn't think he would want me there. 

I decide to take a ride up to the pond for the first time since. I drive slow scared of what I may come to. I reach the dirt road, turnoff. The ledge is barely anything without the ice caps. It takes two steps. It looks completly different. The trees are green exploding with leaves, the water crystal blue and the grass tall and scruffy. It looks so happy, yet still carries the lingering ambionce of that painful day. I stand on the bay for a while just watching the water ripple, kicking pebbles. Finally I get up to leave. 

I go back the following days. Something pulls me back . It slowly heals the pain.  

Its late June. The 26th to be exact. I sit on the bay with my toes in the water. I stare at it. The trees are swaying the cool breeze. I close my eyes and just listen to the scraping of the branches. I drift off a bit. I hear a little cluttering coming from behind me. Just as I open my eyes I feel something land on my shouler. I look up and move back. Stare up behind me. The sun outlines a familiar face. I dont make out who it is at first but my eyes focus, its Nicky. It feels like a dream. He sits down next to me. 

We sit in silence for a long time before he finally breaks the conversation open. 

"I'm sorry." he says squinting at the water. I dont know how to reply. My brain says, get up, run away. My heart makes me answer. 

"Me too." 

"You dont have to be, I over reacted. You didnt do anything wrong." 

Well I know that, but I coudn't say it. He turns to me. 

"Jordy, these last few months, I have been so...lonely. I cant even explain it. I felt so bad, I thought you hated me."

"Would i have stayed with you in the hospital if I hated you? Would I have come out here three days a week if I hated you?" I say starting to get emotional.

"I just panicked" he says plainly. 

"I dont hate you, I felt the same way actually, I cant explain it." I say suddenly feeling a spark

He must have felt it too. He smiles at me.. 

"Jordy." he says wanting my full attention. I turn toward him. 

"Will you go out with me?" he asks gazing into my eyes. 

Was this what I had wanted all along? My head and my heart start bichering again but once again my heart wins. 

"I'd like that." I say with a huge grin growing on my face.

We sit on the bay for a long time. Catching up. I didnt have much to say, I basiclally became a hermit after our little break up. Nicky on the other hand was the oposite. He gave up skating, saying th event traumatized him. He couldnt go near a pair of skates. He rented an appartment near Aniston and started working full time. I choked when he told me. 

The sun starts to set behind the trees. That used to be our 'time to leave' signal. Neither of us flinch. Finally the final rays set behind the hills. I decide its time to go. I get up brushing off my pants. He follows my lead. I dont quite know what to do at this point. I have had many boyfriends but never been stuck in this situation. Do we hug? I can see he is feeling the same way. We do hug. I hold him on me for a long time unaware, not that he seems to mind. My head barely reaches his shoudler. He grew another 2 or so inches since the winter.