Lunatic (l.s)

Chapter 4- H

"No, No," He whispers

The anger is gone, and it's replaced with pain, horror, sadness, grief. He runs his hands through his hair, trying to blink through the tears that have built up. His throat is tight and he can barely breathe, and he lets out a loud sob before he's pulling himself into his pants. He still has his shirt on, but it's covered in her blood. He'll take it off when he gets home, maybe. He crawls to her side, and shakes her, bringing his mouth to hers. He exhales, and feels her chest rise. He blinks, tears splattering onto her face. She's limp and she's not breathing and Harry is crying even harder. He does it again, and again. He grabs her clothes, and dresses her, clipping her bra back on, and sliding her pants back on, before he starts pushing down on her chest.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Jade. baby, please," 

His voice is wrecked, filled with sobs and screams. No matter how long he tries, she's definitely gone. That's when it first started. He murdered his girlfriend at 18. It goes black after that, and he can hear himself whispering "I love you" over and over. It's horrifying, to hear and see the same nightmare over and over, and he can't force himself out of it anymore, he's just too far into it. He does get woken up though, by a pair of strong arms, shaking him hard, but pinning his arms down before he can take a swing. His eyes open wide, and he gasps, his skin covered in a thick layer of sweat, hair stuck to his skin, and he's shaking. He gasps again, and tries to move his arm, but he's pinned down.

"Jade," He breathes, his voice broken

"Hey, hey, it's me," 

The voice is familiar, and Harry closes his eyes and relaxes, because he knows he's safe. The grip on him doesn't lighten until Harry is sure he's calmed down. He doesn't cry any more when he wakes up, he does enough of it in his sleep. He wipes the wetness from his cheeks and his eyelashes and breathes again, his chest hammering against his chest.

"Do you want-,"

"yes,"

His nightmares had become so bad lately, he'd been prescribed some strong anti-anxiety medication, it stopped his freakouts most of the time. Harry hears the foil opening and then a pill is popped into his mouth, he's passed a water bottle and he sculls it down, along with another pill. 

"Was it the same? you were screaming again, you were saying her name, and I thought maybe...maybe you remembered," 

"Always is the same Liam, never stops," 

Liam sits on Harry's bed and stares down at the sweaty boy. Harry's really fucked up, but deep down, in that dead black heart, there's still something living there. It's just hard to find it. Jade was in there, deep in the core of his heart, pumping some kind of emotion there, no matter how many times Harry will screw another girl, it's Jade that really should be there. Liam would be working here for almost 3 years now, he knew Harry too well. He knew Harry before this stupid place though, they were half brothers. Harry's dad and Liam's mum had a thing a while ago, and out popped a little Liam. Liam and Harry had grown up together, but Harry was a year younger than him. Liam was always aware that Harry was always a bit insane, but he didn't love him any less. So when he had found out Harry was found guilty and was being sent here, Liam knew that Harry's mum and sister, and entire family would leave him. Liam took a job offering at the place, worked here full time. He liked being here. He guesses it's because he'd spent so much time aiding Harry, he was used to all the insanity. Liam had changed his name when his mum got re-married to a man, he knew if he was seen as Liam Styles, he wouldn't be accepted into the facility, so he was known at Liam Payne now. Liam breathes.