♡My Embarrassing Stories♡

Tmi

Ok so this one is a lil bit tmi, but whatever. So this story took place last year. My parents and I had just finished eating at red lobster for New Year's Eve, and so my parents and I have the most fucked up relationships in the universe. So we were all in the car driving home and after like 10 mins of driving, my dad blurted out "wow I gotta take a shit really bad right now" and me and my mom were laughing our asses off until my mom said, same (#hippiemom). So we drove for 5 more mins until we found a McDonald's and my dad parked, fucking running his ass to their bathroom and like 2 minutes after, my mom was like "I gotta take a rlly bad shit and ur coming in with me" so I was like whatever and I was waiting for my dad and so afterwards they came out and we drove home and whatever. WELL IT DOESNT STOP THERE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN. So like 4 mins away from my house my dad said "imma stop at Walgreens and get some cigs and wine (because my parents smoke)" and we were like ok. So my dad parks there, and all of a sudden, my moms on her phone, and I'm looking at my dad walk up to the front of the store and I notice (brace urself)..... TOILET FUCKING PAPER HANGING FROM MY DADS PANTS. I was fucking laughing so hard and I was like MOM LOOK AT DADS PANTS and so she did she saw it and was like "GO IN THERE AND TELL HIM!!" So I ran into the fucking store like a mad man and was still laughing so when I found my dad and whispered and told him he had toilet paper hanging out of his ass, it probably sounded like this cuz I was laughing my ass off "dad, chuz have toooooiiiilte passer hanging outta ur ash" so he didn't understand then I ran out and he was looking at me like wtf and I just raced back out and into the car. Once my dad got back in the car after purchasing, I was like "DAD U FUCKING HAVE TOILET PAPER HANGING OUTTA UR PANTS DF" and he was like..."Well, that's a story for the grandkids"

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K so if u didn't understand the moral of the story, my dad had the craps and he wiped his ass and forgot he had toilet paper hanging out or didn't notice he had it and walked into Walgreens where it was really busy and a bunch of people noticed so yaahhhh. God help me.