When I was born I was dead. I wasn't breathing. Sometimes I wish that that doctor wasn't there to make sure my lungs began to function again.
Like tonight. I'm sitting in my room just thinking. I think about what people have said about me. I think about the people I don't like and I think about if it would be better if I wasn't here.
I feel like I'm going to throw up because of these feelings. It feels like my soul is empty and like my heart is sinking. I want to run away.
I open my window but common knowledge returns my head to reality.
"People need you here." I tell myself knowing that's it's just lies.
Every day of school is another level of hell that I descend into. Watching the possible friendships slip away.
She is the first thing I think of when I wake and the last thing I think of before I sleep and it's killing me. Hearing her name just makes me look around for what in the room could kill me.
Sometimes when my mind flutters off in to a different reality I think of her. It kills me.
I can't do shit.
I'm worthless
I'm ugly
I'll never be good enough for anyone.
And it sucks knowing that's the truth.
