Hanging by a Moment [Completed]

I Really Want You

Yes, it does. “Give me some time.”

“What’d he do?”

*

“You guys are Jayden and Peyton, then.” She came over to where the two boys were, laughing at everybody else’s expressions.

Peyton pretended to clutch his chest in shock. “You mean, you didn’t know who we were?”

Jayden snorted, slightly irritated that the girl had interrupted. It was a petty thought to entertain, but he was still on a high from the ‘dance’ he’d shared with his best friend in the middle of the dance floor, and he wanted it to continue.

Just the two of them.

“Not specifically, no,” she was pretty, Jayden supposed. “But if it makes you feel better, I have heard about the two of you.”

“Aw, hear that, Jayden? We’re legends.”

“Oh, I knew that already.”

“So you’re Peyton,” she turned towards him.

“Nope. I just get a kick out of addressing him using my name.”

She laughed. “I’m Kayla, by the way.”

Jayden shook her hand, nodding politely. Peyton looked at him briefly, and although Jayden wanted to act otherwise, he smiled. He’d read the question in his gaze – was he okay with her?

‘Thanks,’ he mouthed, before asking Kayla if she wanted to dance.

She did.

Why was I even trying? “It’s not his fault.”                 

“Hey, are you alright?” Peyton had to yell to be heard over the music.

Jayden considered telling him the truth, but he looked too happy with Kayla at his arm and a glass of punch in his other hand. He’d decided to give them ‘space’, and had ended up alone by the food, listening to the blaring music and watching others enjoy themselves.

It wasn’t that he didn’t have any friends outside of Peyton and Sarah, but he couldn’t bring himself to tear his gaze away from the scene on the dance floor. They were dancing closer than he liked, and laughing, talking, and…it hurt. They were getting along well, with Peyton throwing a smile in Jayden’s direction every so often to let him know just that, and it hurt.

It was wrong, to feel upset that his best friend was enjoying himself, laughing with someone after the Breakup- capitalized- but he couldn’t help it.

He wanted that!

“Yeah, I’m good.” He forced a smile.

“You’re sure? You look bored.”

Jayden shrugged. “I’m good here, thanks.”

To his surprise, Peyton dislodged Kayla from himself, whispering in her ear, and led Jayden away by the arm. “Are you sure?”

“Dude, yeah. Don’t worry!” He insisted, even though he wanted to say otherwise. At least Peyton cared enough.

“I’m sorry for having blown you off for her. It’s just-” he gestured helplessly.

“Peyton, don’t worry about it. It’s good that you two are hitting it off.”

“Yeah, but. Look, I’ll make it up to you somehow, alright?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Thanks. You’re my best friend, you know?”

Jayden nodded sadly.

Sarah seemed somewhat, I don’t know, confused. “But…”

He knew Peyton better than Peyton’s mother did, and he’d been watching the two of them on the dance floor for the better part of an hour, so he should have seen it coming. But he didn’t. One moment they were dancing, the next Peyton had stopped moving and was kissing her.

“But it hurts, you know? He kissed that girl and-” I broke off, realizing how…pathetic that sounded. What right did I have to complain about it, anyway? It’s not like I had any right over Peyton-

“Jayden.”

“And nothing! I should be happy for him,” my face was starting to heat up, “but I’m not. And this is just so messed up, because he’s my best friend, and best friends aren’t supposed to hope that nothing happens between their friend and someone else!”

“It’s not your fault either, you know.”

“Yeah?” I laughed bitterly, the tears on the edge, “You don’t say.”

I expected something along the lines of ‘It’s okay to be upset,’ I think, but whatever it was, it wasn’t a gentle ‘Let it out.’

It was enough to get me going.

“This really, really sucks, you know? We’ve been best friends for fifteen years, and now…” I tasted the salt on my lips. “And it’s all my fault. I didn’t ask to fall for him, but I didn’t fight it either, so now it’s so bad that I can’t even be happy for him when he finally gets over Jenna.”

“It’s okay.”

I buried my head in my hands. “Instead, me, his best friend, only prays that things don’t work out for him!”

She was rubbing my back, cooing softly, and I couldn’t stop.

“It’s just not fair,” I hiccupped, “that I can’t even imagine not being friends with him! But I can’t-can’t even do this anymore! He likes her, Sarah, he really does, even if they just met and-”

“Sh, it’s okay Jayden.”

“No, it’s not! I’m not meant to think of him as anything besides my best friend! He probably sees me as his brother and-” a ton of bricks collapsed. “Oh, God. We’re meant to be like brothers and here I am-oh, God.”

“Jay-”

I felt sick. “He’ll hate me. I’ll have made things awkward and he’ll hate me forever for it!” The tears were flowing freely. It was more of a culmination of having suppressed...everything…for all those months than my being upset about seeing him with someone else, but yeah, the sudden realization of just how messed up all of it was wasn’t helping me feel any better.

“He won’t.” She said firmly.

“You don’t know that.” I sobbed.

“I do.”

I shook my head. “No, but it’s okay. Nobody’s telling him. And in the meanwhile I just need to figure this out and get over it. Maybe if they get together I’ll stop having these sick feelings for him and-”

“Jayden! Stop!”

I couldn’t stop. The fear of him finding out had consumed me, and…he couldn’t know. He just couldn’t. “Then he’ll never have to know. He’ll never have to know how sick I am, thinking about him in that way when I’m meant to be his brother. Oh God, if he does, he’ll hate me. Or get really weirded out and we won’t be friends anymore-”

“Jayden! You’re talking crap now.”

I was about to open my mouth and contradict her, but another voice entered the scene – and shut me up.

“I’m going to have to agree with her.”

It took me precisely two seconds to process the reason why the voice sounded so familiar, and when I did-

“Peyton?” Sarah was up on her feet before me.

Comment, please? (Also, how many cliche points do I score for this oh-so original 'cliffhanger'?) <- Aye, this story is cliche. But yeah.  Aand, the song is by James Blunt :)