Complicated Love

Holding On

I fly out of bed. It's my first day back at school since it happened. I was terrified about what people would think. I missed a month of school after the fire. I know it wasn't my fault he was gone but I couldn't help to blame myself for him being dead. I missed my dad, he was the only person I could really talk to. I pulled myself out of my thoughts. I needed to get ready for the day. I could smell pancake batter, my "mom" has been trying to impress me. She knew I was mad at her for leaving me back when I was eight but when daddy died she stepped up. I quickly flung on a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt. I threw my hair up in a pony tail before going downstairs to face her.
As I walked into the kitchen I could sense her disapproval in my outfit choice, but she kept her mouth shut. "Are you excited for your first day back baby girl?" I rolled my eyes. I was getting tired of her pretending like she cared. " As ready as I'll ever be" I muttered as I spread peanut butter on my pancake and slapped another one on top. Her mouth fell open as I ate it like a sandwich. She never approved of the way I ate. I nearly swallowed the pancake whole as I ran back upstairs to grab a coat and my backpack. Melissa was honking her horn in my drive way. I barged down the steps " Love you sweetie have a good day" my mother called after me as I ran out the door into the coldness.
The only people I have had contact with for the past month are Melissa and Tyler. I must have gotten a million messages a day asking how I was going and talking about how much they missed me but those were just people who felt sorry for me. I slammed the door as I settled into the back seat. "Hey beautiful" Tyler said. He kept his eyes fixed on the road. He probably didn't want to look at my face, the scars had taken it over. I snarled " do you really have to butter me up" I asked. "Calm down princess I was only trying to help you have the best day ever" I rolled my eyes. " babe you have to look up from that phone at some point" Melissa said looking through her mirror. I ignored her and crammed headphones into my ears. Tyler reached back and ripped them out then snatched my phone out of my hand. " what are you five?" I asked and I nearly climbed into the front seat trying to retrieve it. He held it out the window. "What is up with you today sassy pants?" I continued reaching. "Nothing, now give it back" I snared. He pretended to drop it out the window. "Will you to quit it? Your making it hard to focus!" Melissa yelled. "Tell him to give it back" I yelled back at her. "You really think I can control him? Last time he listened to either of us was when he was five" I sank back into the back seat. Melissa pulled into the school parking lot. "Are you ready?" Tyler whispered. "I'm scared" I said as I climbed out of the car. "Don't worry princess" he said as he grabbed my hand then Melissa's. This was normally how we walked into school. Everyone thought it was weird but it took away most of my nerves. Everyone stared as we walked to the front door.