Lead Me

When times stands still

Do you ever feel like you're painfully and slowly suffering from something and you wish you were dead at that moment?
Well, I feel like that all of the time. Mostly when I make a mistake and it comes back to get me. I feel like a failure and loser. I can't even breathe. I can't say the things I really feel, and most of all, when I say the truth, all any one believes is a lie and the total opposite of the truth. Sometimes I feel like, why do I even try? No one is going to believe what I say, no one is going to even care what I say. But you know what, there's a point to me trying my best and living every day to its fullest, even though I feel pain and I suffer through a lot of mean and criticizing comments that people make.

My reason is him. He is the reason. He is why I try, he is why I stand on this Earth today, he is my reason for everything. It's always him, and it's always going to be him.

That's what I think. He is my everything. Actually I know that he is, there's just a few things bothering me. Does he know how much I love him and care about him? Does he know I respect but don't always agree with the things he does? Does he know I will stand by him through anything? Does he know he is my everything, my one and only, and he will always be those things? Does he know that?