Life After Rehab ✓

[Chapter Sixty-Three] Where They Finalize Plans

We have both yet to read our letters from her.

"Okay, so who do you want by your side?" That was easier said than done; we made our lists and ended up pulling off three people each to make five as well as fight over whose side Mia was on. To make it even, she ended up on mine so we could still pair one girl with one guy. Now we had to ask each of them and Bailey had to take them for dresses before we could get tuxes.

We debated on one side wearing each color but we didn't want to divide them like that; they were all there for us and so the girls would all wear different dresses in different colors, but I chose lace as the standard. The guys would get the color to match the girl they would be walking with and they would deal with it.

This was already giving me a headache and I wanted all these decisions to just be made. There were so many little details that went into weddings that I wished we could have eloped instead. Then again, Bailey wanted a wedding and honestly I did too, In a weird way I liked all of this. I have become domesticated and whipped.

We called it a night and went to bed knowing we had a lot of shit to do tomorrow.

We started off with seeing the venue and meeting the wedding planner we had hired. Bailey and I both decided there was too much in New York to do and so we called around until we found someone who would take us on and handle the details from there. We walked around with her and told her what we wanted and Bailey showed her everything we had already.

She went with us to the caterer and I admit sampling the food was a highlight and bonus of getting married. We decided to serve wine and champagne at our reception after a long discussion; we could handle it. The cake was by far the hardest part, Bailey and I didn't argue over flavors, but we were at a loss for design. The jungle theme for a zoo wedding seemed overused but we didn't just want a white cake with flowers either. No completely white cakes or draping, but she did like the look of pearls. We had to leave and make another appointment to come back because we had to make the flower appointment.

Once we got to that one we realized we had no damn clue what we wanted there either; it's a good thing florists are patient.

Between anemone, lilies, carnations, hydrangeas and chrysanthemums that can come in burgundy to cosmos, dahlias, daisies and gardenias that came in white; I was at a loss of what to pick. The there were lisianthus that could come in a light green and they give a rose look without using such a traditional flower. Bailey took it a little more seriously than I did, to make it easier I let her take the lead on the flowers and gave my input; cosmos over daisy's lilies in burgundy instead of blue and to add the colored carnations.

She went a completely nuts when she picked seven flowers to make arrangements out of, but she kept insisting she liked them all and the florist said she would find a way to make it work. We would have dusty blue hydrangeas, burgundy anemone, green lisianthus, burgundy lilies that faded to white, white cosmos, burgundy dahlias as well as dusty blue and sage green carnations to break up all the dark that the burgundy brought.

As the time passed with the florist, I stepped in more to help plan arrangements. Bailey couldn't decide on short or tall centerpieces so we were going to alternate. The florist had free reign on the five different flowers that would make the best boutonnieres. We chose a couple arrangements we liked and she would have the final say on which looked better; we trusted her experience.

We met with the photographer Nia chose and did engagement photos. We picked up the new crap made to send out food options and spent an entire day getting those done and blowing up our browser history with wedding cake designs. This fucking cake was the first time Bailey and I really fought over this wedding. Awe ended up near screaming before Mia broke it up and told us to just do a damn bridge cake and stop stressing. She then rolled her eyes, told us to stop acting like children and went back to her own room.

"Bridge cake." Bailey repeated under her breath as she searched for it online.

"Oh, that's pretty cool." It was different cakes between one and three tiered that were connected with little plastic bridges. In some there was a gap under the main cake with fountains, flowers, and really anything you wanted.

"That's a really good idea." Yet she frowned at it.

"And with two hundred people, it's an amazing idea. Instead of this huge six tiered cake we could do three cakes. Bailey could design one, I could and we could compromise on the main cake.

"You know, I think we're trying too hard to make this cake match our wedding and we're not thinking about it matching us. How about this," She pulled up two images. One cake half wrapped with sheet music and one fully. "Music is a big part of us both now as individuals and as a couple. I'm sorry for yelling." There was no way I couldn't relax when she leaned into my side and we ignored the laptop for five minutes and talked everything out; it was much more effective than fighting.

Weddings were stressful and it didn't need to be; the day I got to marry her was going to be the best day of my life and there was nothing stressful, frustrating, angering or toxic about becoming her husband. It would be a great day and with a wedding planner; it took a lot of stress off us.

Bailey and I went with a four tiered cake half wrapped in sheet music and we would do the music for the song we still needed to choose for our first dance. The tiers would be separated on each of the four cakes like they were floating opposed to the traditional tiers which sat on top of each other. We went with four to have a custom top to save for our first anniversary because I guess that was what people did.

The image we liked had a fountain under the main cake; Bailey and I were doing a piano and guitar. On the other half of the sheet music were each of our initials on the second and third tier and the last name we soon would share on the bottom.

The two cakes we chose were grand and complexly beautiful. I didn't think I would ever be this into the design of a cake; this whole process is surreal and now I can't imagine there was ever a time where I didn't want this.

Four years ago I can remember going to a party and doing a few lines, a half naked girl sliding her hand up my thigh as I took a shot or did another one. In those moments I would pull one girl to a bedroom, or just fuck her wherever since everyone else was high anyway, and think how I never wanted it to end. At the time I would pass out thinking that this was the life, this was what living felt like.

No, that was what dying felt like. Every single day I was killing myself from the inside out. Each line, each shot was a step closer to my early death. Being clean and sober was what living life felt like. Holding and loving her, seeing Mia grow and become the beautiful young lady she is, watching my mother fall in love again and Kylie record; that was living. Starting a family is living. Most importantly, being healthy and last the quality of life I've had three years; that was truly living.

That small conversation cleared the air and made the final decision seemed easier somehow.

"I'm happy that this is all so I can marry you."

"Me too pretty girl." Sometimes I wished she could see into my mind so she could understand just how I feel or see her. If only she could see how much she changed my life and how she made me feel alive again.

One Sunday night Mia went home to stay with my mother for a couple days and we met with the bakery with clear heads this time. Sonja, our wedding planner, went over every detail she could with us before we took Tuesday off to enjoy the city and each other and then head home Wednesday morning to get the mutt and beat Mia home with him.

"Hey, you guys home?" Mia yelled as soon as she got home, my mother picked up both kids and Travis came into view right behind Mia.

The dog barked and headed straight for her. It was Bailey's idea to have his collar on with a big blue bow.

"Jupiter!" This was the first we were hearing about his name and she hugged him tight.

"Where did you come up with that name?" It was kind of an odd name

"Zeus was too common so I went with Roman over Greek." I admit I was impressed she knew the two names and the different mythologies.

"I like it." Bailey patted his head and I kept my distance; just because he was living here didn't mean I had to like him, as long as I was nice to him and tolerated him. We didn't need to be best friends.