The Passion of London [Highlander's Love #1]

Chapter 15 - Picture of Amhuinn

He had been a bonny and braw Lowlander seeking work in the castle, ending up as a kitchen boy when Amelia was thirteen, and working his way up to a footman. They had been a childhood romance, but when Geordie was buried six feet under, Amelia wasn't sure if she could find anyone like him.

Now that she had though, she wasn't sure if it was because he was like him that she was attracted to Hammond MacKenzie, or not.

"Tisn't fair to you, laird."

"Canna I be the judge of that?"

"My duty lies to the castle, and to me mistress, Laird MacKenzie. I canna."

Hammond's features were tight by then, wound together by frustration and hurt at Amelia's continuous denial of his offer. He took a step back, and then another. "If I were to insist, lass?"

"I will avoid ye, laird. Tis a memory of my husband that I fear would be a disservice to ye if I agree."

"Would ye live the rest of ye life alone, lass?"

"Would ye be content if I continuously compared ye to my dead husband?"

Silence. Hammond saw the truth in his words, but could not deny the hurt that came with it. While he would say he didn't mind now, he doubted he would be able to live with it five or ten years down the line, when he still wondered if she would compare him to her husband, or whether he was simply a substitute for a dead man.

Recognizing why she denied him now, he let his arms drop from holding her shoulders, but could not wipe the frustrated look on his face. "I leave on the morrow, Madam Kinloch. It's been a pleasure, thank ye."

After five long weeks of travel and being away from Amelia, Hammond would say he was much better now. The first week, he knew he had been a nightmare to be around, but the more he was in the Highlands, the more the air of his birth land reinvigorated him. Connor had reminded him, but he was surprised to find the memory of the dark haired lass now only brought a wistful smile to him, and nothing else.

"I tried, friend. I had the courage. Do ye have the courage to take a lass who loves you, and all the problems which comes with it?"

With a lass, knowing smile at his captain, he grinned and walked back to campsite, leaving the brooding Connor to his thoughts as he took a seat next to his redhead cousin, gratefully accepting the bowl of stew from her. God, he couldn't wait to return to his roasts and pudding once they got back to the Keep. If Hammond had been alone, he would've pressed on, but he was a just laird who didn't wish to exert his men.

"Does he not wish to sup, cousin?"

"Him?" Hammond threw a look over his shoulder upon Evie's quiet query, and chuckled. "Leave him to his thoughts. He'll search for food when his stomach growls."

Unable to resist chancing a look at him, the redhead bit her lip when her chest twisted within herself again, settling on her haunches. "What happened to the two siblings in the woods? You didn't harm them did you, Hammond?" she asked, searching for any excuse to distract herself from the painful subject that was Connor's silent denial. In truth, a part of her had hoped that he would proclaim her heritage too small of a matter to distract him from her, from being with her. But how could she expect one so proud as he, to push aside his own life, for her?

"They are fine. I left them our provisions, which was why we've been having such meagre meals since yesterday night."

"Would they be alright alone though? Co- I have been warned on the dangers in the Highlands."