Here Without You

Chapter 1:

Chapter 1:

-Flashback-

His heavy breath reeks of alcohol and an overdose of cologne, centering so he's breathing straight into my face. His eyes are dilated, swaying lightly expressing his drunk characteristics. His face is a steaming red, his eyes matching the color of his face. He looks on the edge of tears, though his gritted jaw looks the opposite. Defending himself will not be easy, especially with the many pictures clearly showing my side.

Can he not see what he's doing to me? It's one thing to get drunk and go to a club at midnight while i'm doing a preformance, but to makeout with a random girl in front of paps? That's ridiculous. I'm so done with Harry and all of this. His drinking is becoming a problem for our relationship. Or, past relationship.

The moment is filled with screaming with rough pushing exchanged throughout the duration of the argument. Nothing like our usual sweet and playful tackles and kisses, this is horrible. The dark side of Harry is scary, but this side, the side where he's totally enraged at me, is horrid.

"Harry, why don't you leave?" I sigh, running a hand through my sweaty blonde hair. The good times come rushing past like a whirlwind. But that doesn't matter, our memories that is, all that matters is that its over. I'd like to forgive him, tell him it's okay and to just hug me, but I cant. Why? Well that's just inexplicable. My hearts taken its toll and another heartbreak is just making it numb. He looks down at the ground, his neck veins pulsing out red.

"Forever?" He mumbles through his teeth, his fists clench then release before reclinching moments later. I nod, watching as he bursts out of the room while his boots click through the tile and out the door. Out of my life.

•• End of flashback

I stir my coffee around the pottery cup around whilst waiting on my breakfast to arrive. The memories of Harry still wander around my brain aimlessly. It's been 4 months since the fight, when I first saw the picture that took my world and flipped it upside down- along with my stomach. The depression that followed couldn't be expressed in words. I wasn't happy, not even my fans, the ones that could always cheer me up, didn't get more than a smirk out of me. The hate had grown worse with our breakup, furthering my depression into the consideration of self-harming myself. I almost did, had the razor in hand when my mom had walked in- stopped me and hugged me tight. She told me i'd be okay, assured me of all my struggles.

Just all the thoughts of Harry make my appetite slowly fade into a nausious mess. The plate full on eggs, pancakes, bacon, and grits are slid in front of me by the waitress. I flash her a forced smile, something I've done a lot of lately. Even to my friends, such as Selena, Amos, and Grant. Nobody knows the war going on inside me right now, and frankly, I dont want anyone to know.

••