My First Love

My Dreams

In the rainy day at the park kevin still standing in the small cottage, he is waiting for someone. Even in that time of the day he always stand at the cottage for more than an hours, waiting for a kid to come in the park to play. While holding a bag in his right hand, it was full of sweets chocolates and candies.

He's waiting and waiting, but no one comes, even a mother caressing there baby and walking along to other mother or any little kid running around in the park. Its so gloomy and lonely there that Kevin hated the most.

He do not care of anyone if they not come at park to play, kevin want is one little boy that always talk and play with him. The little boy always smile to him, and because of that smile Kevin's heart is full of life.

He didn't losing hope that the little boy would come like the other time. When he still standing in the middle of the cottage his eye looking at the entrance in the park, hoping that the kid will poke his head in the entrance and run coming with him, with the bright smile in his face.

Waiting and still waiting......

But kevin not lose hope he knows Ruci will come like his promise...

Ring.... Ring...

Kevin jerked in surprice, he open his eye because of the sound, another set of ring of his alarm clock for waking his up. He stay still and not wanting to move, while looking at the ceiling of his room. His alarm clock still ringing none stop.

He stay more than two minites in bed before siting up, he looks in his alarm clock in a second and grab it, he turn off the swicth and put it back over his side table's bed. Kevin's sigh in relift when the sound of the clock has stoped.

He sit on the edge of his bed and look for nothingness.. he stay that for awhile. Kevin's memories in his dream are came back insantly, he remember the thing of his past 10 years ago. That dreams allways back on him, allways visiting him in the present day, by day. Its been 3 times in this week that he dreams that again. Why?

Even 10 years has past the memory is still there, the felling are just happen like yesterday. Its too clear like a river flowing down in the mountain and like the winds of the hills whispering in his ears. Its still fresh and Kevin really love that memories of his past. The past that allways inside on his heart.

He came back to his sense and look to the clock hanging on the wall, its 6:14 am in the morning, Kevin knows that still early in the morning in that time, but he need to move and prefered his self, he need to go to work at 7:30 his pectorial start at 8:00 am.

Kevin start to move his body, he need to take a bath fist and brush his teeth, he walks and go inside of the bathroom and do the things that he need to do.

While resting his head in the spray of water in the shower and allowed the hot water flow to his skin. He fills the sensation of that rainy day and he close his eyes..." where going to move soon kevin..." the memory poke him, and instanly he open his eyes. A heavy sigh scape on his lips.

"Why..still coming back.. that the word he say?." He said it self.

When he is done for everything that he need, he ready him self to go at work, he look the watch in his hand, and its 6:45 am.

"Oh god! Iam going to be late..!" He said and grab his bag pack that laying in the couch.

He need to hurry before he late at work, he have a 30 minites to travel along his car, when his runing to go on the door he remember that he didn't eat anything for morning breakfast. He stop and hurrying to go at the kitchen, when he is infront of refrigerator he open on it, when Kevin scan inside he look for something that easy to eat even when he'll drive at his car. He grab a one corton of Nestle milk and close the frige. He look for bread.

"Where did i put the bread?" Asking his self on purpose.

When Kevin find it over in the counter bar, he grab and took a 2 slice of bread on it. He put it in bitween his lips and run again toward the door. While hurrying to go on work and to scared to being late, he forget his cellphone that laying in the couch....

********************

While his driving, he on the radio in the car and look for morning news, he wants to relax inside the car while eating his meal, a large bite of bread that make Kevin to humming sound, its like that the bread is a delicious food of all, and next a large gulps of his nestle milk. When he'll than for eating the food, he focus his self on driving, eyes in the road.

Even his eyes are on the road, kevin's brain gaze in a far away place, the happy memories of his teenage life is picturing in his eyes like a movie in the theater. That times he always play happily and talks a never ending stories, funny jokes or making sand castle. Its very happy that makes Kevin wants to go back in his past, its fill nostalgia to him.

********************

When kevin comes in his work its 7:40 am that time, he took him a lots of time and waste it, its because of that stupid traffic along in the road. It was a car accident happed, its say that 2 car bump to each other because of over speeding.

And cause of that kevin Pissed off in his lovely day. He only want is to go on work peacefuly, he hate to being late even knows that he is not late at all. He have a 20 minutes to prefered his self before the pictorial start, it was a good news to him.

"Kevin darling.. are you ready? We start before 8, so ready your self alright. Go to studio 3 after you change your cloths..." it was his manager Marisita said. Marisita works on kevin in 3 years, she know kevin very well, what is he likes or dislike in everything. Even his favorite foods and hubby,she is 7 years older than kevin.

He is 29 years old ang Marisita are 36 in this year, she have a family even she lose a husband and become a single mother to suport her 2 little children. She is loving mother and important freind for kevin.

"Okey Sita!... I will.. Just give me a minutes." Kevin said.

"....Okey!." Marisita said, she turn aroud and walk outside, she need to prefered before anything for Kevin photo shoot. She go fist on the studio 3.

Kevin start taking off his shirt and start changing his cloths, he thought of him self when this work are done for this day, he can relax and sleep when he go home. Its to tired to move when the shoot are over, because of the none stop pausing on the camera Kevin fills his body shift and he'll have a muscle cramps.

So he need the things to be over... a very big sigh scape in between Kevin's lips. His work are not starting yet, but its like he'll tired right now.

For all those years he focus him seft on work, and its been 5 years that he start working as a professional model. Even Marisita his manager give him a lots of vacations, in sumer or winter, but Kevin's the one who always refused with it. Telling her that he didn't needed it, the day off is morethan enough to him.

Because for Kevin vacation is the most lonely part of his life, for him it wasting of time. What the meaning of vication to him? if he always alone, even he have a vacation villa or resort, he cant enjoy with it. No one in Kevin's family can join with him, its because they migrate to other country he's the onlyone living by himself. Not because of his job or something, he love to live in this country cause his heart is still here.

He thought of him self if he live and living in the other country where his family is. He'll die in loneliness, his heart is still in this place, he never want to go anywhere, never...

Kevin intack him self on his past. He cant never scape with it, even he wanted it. Because of his past he still hoping that he will fined the missing pieces in his heart someday...

.......to be continue......