irl one shots (-:

sOLanDY

yo bitches I dedicate this shizzle to my boy kim bc he wanted me to. ALsO ANYBODY ELSE AT MY SCHOOL OR IN GENERAL THAT SHIPS SOLANDY UR WELCOME HOES (-;
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so get this shit- there once was a little bitch named soil, and she shared an apartment with her main hoes voyaging moon and hot cheese. voyaging moon and hot cheese both had fuCKIN boyfriends, and often tried getting soil a boy toy, but ALL EFFORTS FAILED because soil would not stop making daddy jokes.

"SOIL U LITTLE HOE THIS IS THE THIRD DATE UVE BEEN ON IN A WEEK THAT U HAVE REKT DUE TO UR EXCESSIVE DADDY JOKES! I AM SO DONE WITH UR BITCH ASS" voyaging moon yelled.

"hi 'done with your bitch ass'" soil responded, the Lenny face practically plastered on her face.

"fuckin shit man why tf u hoes yellin i was tryna take a muthafukin nap goddam." hot cheese walked into the living room, yawning, whilst voyaging moon was preparing to fite a mf hoe. aka soil. who doesn't wana fite soil? evrybuddy wanna fite soil.

"LITTLE BITCH RUINED ANOTHER DATE WITH HER DUCKING DAD JOKES! I GIVE UP M8 SHES A FUCKIN NOOB!" voyaging moon left the room and walked into her bedroom, probably writing some angsty poetry in a diary about how nobody understands her teen rebellion and angst. or maybe to watch anime. who knows. she's a weeb.

"THATS IT SOIL KFDKSK. IM FINNA TAKE U TO THIS PARTY THAT MUTHAFUCKIN KIM FROM THE HOOD IS THROWIN, ITS FINNA BE LIT, AND U FINNA GET A MUTHAFUCKIN BOY TOY! DAD JOKES ARE OFF LIMITS U LIL HOE." hot cheese ended her rant session with a groan that proved that she was 420% done with soleils shit.

"the letter 'u' is the 21St letter of the alphabet." soleil whispered. THAT FUCKIN LENNY FACE IS ALWAYS ON HER FACE. BY NOW LENNY MUST HAVE REPLACED HER GDI JAN.

"SOOOILLL" hot cheese was getting pretty "hot" headed if you ask me, but I don't know anything, im just a really crappy author narrating a love story.

hOt cheese grabbed soils puny little noodle arm and dragged her to the car, where they proceeded to drive to Kim's trap house for the lit ass party.

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when soil arrived at the party, she immediately saw a fuckin a1 dood. soil did not know she was attracted to anybody until that very moment.

"FUCKIN SHIZZLE, HOT CHEESE, THAT DIZZLE OVER THERE IS SO FUCKIN HOT I CAN HEAR HIM SIZZLE" soil exclaimed, obviously love struck by the WEEB in the corner of the room.

"SOIL OH MY GOD YOU HAVE A THING FOR RANDALL LEW? THE TOMMY MCNEIL? RUNK? THAT FUCKIN WEEB? I BET HE WATCHES BOKU NO PICO" hot cheese SCREAMED out, loud enough for the mysterious WEEB in the corner of the room who now seemed to have a name.

the weeb in the corner of the room winked at soil and SOil nearly fuckin died on the spot. HE looked hotter than that toast she burnt her mouth on That morning.

"SOIL HES COMIN OVER HER E!! REMEMBER, CRACK ONE DAD JOKE AND I WILL PERSONALLY REK U M8! I WILL NOSCOPE YOU SO FUCKIN HARD-" hot cheese suddenly realized soil was no longer near her, buT INSTEAD HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH RUNK !

"yo bitch my name's randy and I'm the biggest WEEB ull ever meet dood!" Randy winked at soil.

"UH HELL O IM UH,,, IM UH,,,," soil was distracted by how fucking hot she thought Randy was.

"hi 'uh.'" Randall said, AND SUDDENLY SOIL WAS IN LOVE. HE MADE A FUCKIN DAD JOKE.

despite the random dood making out with his sweater 3 feet away from them, soil had her attention on only randall. they made crappy puns and dad jokes the whole night, and soil EVEN SCORED HIS SKYPE !

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after that party, soil and randy immediately married and had a weed themed wedding on April 20th, 2016. THEY EVEN HAD 69 LITTLE BABIES AND ALL OF THEM WERE NAMED LENNY BESIDES ONE, WHICH WAS NAMED TOAST. THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER. THE END. (-: