It is just so so unfair.
Sometimes I wonder, do I really deserve all of this? Everything? Cause I don't even know what to do anymore. What to believe. They say that she loves me. But if it's true, then why did she left me? Abandoned me? Why did she threw me away like I'm some kind of a piece of trash? Am I really that unlovable? Am I not good enough? What is it? Maybe it's for the fact that I was just a mistake. An unwanted, drunken mistake. And let me tell you this, it hurts. It fucking hurts. So much that I can feel myself going numb. But it also pisses me off that no one ever gives me real answers. I just want to know the whole truth. And unfortunately, the one who knew the truth is the one who's gone. Hiding from me and the world. Well aside from her perfect little family, that is, which of course, doesn't include yours truly. Lovely, isn't it? Oh well. I guess that's life. But will I give up? Definitely not. I'm gonna fight. Fight for myself because I know that no one else will. I will survive this pain, this bitterness. And when I do, I'm gonna stand there and show everyone who left, mocked, hurt and never believed in me, that I survived. That even without them, I survived. And you will, too. I swear. So keep your head up high, love. No matter how cliche this sound, everything will be okay. Just have a little bit of faith. Cause even when every single person in this world left you, at least you have yourself. And for me, that's more important. So you take care and stay stronger. Aja!
- G
