Mars One is an organization which establishes the first humans to settle on Mars. Every two years, a new group of four astronauts will settle on Mars. These people must be well-trained, to adjust in the new environment, and to face all the challenges that they will be having ever since they shall land on the red planet-no, ever since they are about to start the journey.
And I happen to be one of the four selected people.
As I took one final, heavy breathe here on this planet before stepping in the spacecraft, I heard someone call for my name from the crowd. My eyes searched within the crowd to find the owner of the voice.
I frowned as I finally found the person calling for me, pushing himself through to the front.
My father...
Or should I say, someone who was my father.
I stepped away from the spacecraft back down to the crowd. The cameras that were flashing were hurting my eyes, but what sores my eyes more is when I saw him who finally got through. I watched him breathe heavily for air.
I glared down at the man with a rich-looking tie as I waited for him to speak. As he finished his panting, he looked up, with humble eyes. His mouth was opened, ready to say something.
"...Don't get in that spacecraft," he finally said.
I narrowed my eyes at him.Now it was my turn to speak.
"And what are you doing here, dad ?" I watched him straighten his back so he could look straight at me.
"I said, "Don't get in that spacecraft"".
"You don't have the right to say that," I mumbled.
Now, he looked more proper this time. "Oh yes I have the right. I am your parent after all."
No matter what, he doesn't really lower his pride. It's useless talking to him now. "Oh, I thought you were my parent. After all, you left me and my sister all alone and replaced mom for that new woman you have. Uh, what's her name again? I remembered that just a year ago, she had the same surname with us." And with that, I turned my heel once again up to the spacecraft.
"Hey now, don't turn your back on me!" He shouted as he grabbed my shoulder.
"Look at me!"
I won't look at you.
"Hey! Show your respect!"
You show me your respect...
"...Please..."
Please your...please?
"You're not going to have fun there,you're going to have a hard time adjusting to Mars time. You'll barely even see the Earth anymore..." He stopped, and i felt him tremble.
" YOU'RE GOING TO DIE MILES AWAY FROM US!" He cried as I felt his hand from my shoulder fall to my arm, and his knees falling to the ground.
I did not dare to turn my back and look at him.
"...So you care if I'm going to die? But isn't that natural?Like when Mom died from overwork? And when my sister killed herself after getting bullied in school because of the things that happened?"
"STOP!"
"You stop! Stop talking, stop crying,stop this act...STOP TELLING ME TO STOP!"
I felt the corner of my eyes filling up. My shoulders were starting to shake and my voice trembling of both anger and sadness. Why is he doing this? Why now of all time?!
"Because I love you..."
I bit my lower lip as the tears started flowing. It's like he read my mind and answered my question.The cameramen stopped taking shots, and took the scene seriously. I started to feel that he's right,this isn't an act.
"No...you love that woman of yours..." I fought back still not looking at him.
"Look, I accepted the way you look at me. But I won't change the way I look at you...all of you."
Without thinking, I turned to him and pulled him to a hug. It's been a long time since I hugged him like this. I felt the anger lessen, the pain lighter. But I still have the hate within me.
"Do you know why I signed up for this?" I broke the moment. "Ever since the roses of the family died, I thought hard that I should cause suicide too. But do you know why I didn't? Because dying fast like that is not equal to the pain that mom and my sis have experienced. That's why I signed up for this, took every step of the process, training, and accepted the truths that I will be facing from now on. To feel the pain of being lonely and away from home miles away. To feel empty. To stay away from the cruel people on this planet. And I will be with other people who feels the loneliness. Yes, I complicated way for suicide, it is." And with that, I broke the hug and turned my heel.
I climbed up the spacecraft that was about to leave. Before I went in further, I gently smiled to the man that I hated as I heard his final words.
"I love you, my child..."
888I held up my hand and made a V-sign. I held my chin high and smiled the widest smile I ever had.
