Haunted

Rootless Tree

"That makes sense."

"I like you a lot Eli, please don't think it's that I don't like you enough it's just that I don't know and like, the distance thing, you know?"

"I know, I wish I could see you," Eli sighed. "I wasn't like, asking you to be my boyfriend or anything. I really like you too, Dax, and you've been flirting a lot lately and I guess I just wanted to know if that was how you are with everyone or not."

"Now you know," Maddox smiled.

"Maddox, dinner," Kylie didn't bother knocking.

"I have to go," Maddox sighed. "I'll text you though. I'll be at the studio tonight."

"Okay," Eli said. "Bye Dax."

"Bye," Maddox hung up and went downstairs to eat.

He survived his night at the studio with Justin and even managed to sleep like a normal person before he went to the doctor to get his cast off the next day. After that he had to go shoot his music video which meant his wardrobe team had to work hard to make sure no one could tell his right arm was so weird looking after having been in a cast so long. But that wasn't the biggest problem Maddox had that day.

"Cut!" Maddox heard the director yell. "Dax, it's left, left, right."

"I know," Maddox groaned. This was the 5th time they'd stopped because he missed a step. It was choreography he'd been doing for weeks on tour but for some reason he couldn't land it here. Why, why, why?

"Let's go again," Tim called. They started over and Maddox tried to hit every step but not even 30 seconds later he missed a step and moved right as everyone was going left.

"I'm done," Maddox said and didn't wait for them to cut before he took off running. Tim tried to catch him as he ran past but Maddox kept going. He flung open his dressing room door and threw himself on the couch.

"Dax, just calm down," Tim was right behind him and Maddox sat up.

"Can you back off for like 5 seconds?" Maddox snapped. "Just leave me alone."

"Okay," Tim held his hands up backed out the door.

Maddox let out a huge sigh and stood up. He stood in front of the mirror and started going through his pocket to find the blade he'd started carrying with him. Most of the time it was enough just to close his hand around it so it stung a little but at a time like this he needed more. He pulled his shirt up and looked for a clean section of skin.

As much as he'd thought confessing his secret to Eli would help, Maddox actually found himself wanting to cut even more. If he were really as perfect and amazing as everyone thought he wouldn't need to do something so pathetic. But, as Maddox had to admit after the way his music video was going, he was far from perfect. He was so useless he deserved all the pain he could bring on himself and more.

Maddox watched as the blood bubbled up from his fresh cuts and grabbed a tissue to keep it from getting on the pants he was wearing for the video. When he knew he'd stopped the bleeding, Maddox dropped the tissues in the trash and fixed his hair. He practiced his smile in the mirror, just to make sure no one could tell anything was bothering him, and went back to finish the shoot.

The rest of the night went fine and Maddox finished taping without any other problems. He was in an exceptionally good mood by the time he got home and took a shower.

There were a few texts waiting for him when he came out of the bathroom. Maddox grinned as he read them and started to respond.

Eli: how's the video coming?