Maybe I was put in her life for a reason. She forever changed me. And her loss and pain will agonize me always. Of course I wish I could've said goodbye. But sometimes my plan doesn't match the truth. And maybe this time was one of them.
Elena was the sweetest girl I knew, putting a smile on everyone's face. She knew her craft, her family, and she was above all, caring. She dragged her left boot along the edge of the curb and caught snowflakes on the tip of her tongue. Her big, brown eyes glanced over at me. I gave her a weak smile, as my eyes gazed into hers. Maybe I didn't realize this moment was the last time this would ever happen to her and I. I looked away and we continued walking, even though we hadn't discussed where we were going. We just walked. And neither of us said anything. This happened often. We would just be with each other in our thoughts. Sometimes it was the best thing we could do for each other, listen. Something I wasn't good at. I felt like I didn't ever want to be the center of attention, but I always had something to say when I was in a conversation. Elena wasn't like that. She kept the majority of the thoughts she had to herself. Something I admired about her.
We slowly came upon the Spring Meadow. Well, if it was up to me, I wouldn't call it a meadow. It was more of a old, dreary lot. Maybe once it was a beautiful meadow, but no more. Although it wasn't the prettiest place, it was the type of thing you had to explore first before you said it was "just a place". It was like an old chest you found deep in your attic, and stacked inside were treasures full of memories. I was so busy thinking, I almost forgot Elena was still here. She has the familiar, slightly sad, slightly confused, look on her face. She was staring at the big oak tree. She yawned and then looked at me. Awkward moment because she saw I was looking at her first. "So," she said, slowly pacing around the tree. "how did we end up here..." She had said it in such a dull, non-expressive tone, I couldn't tell if she was asking me or just kind of saying it. "Well," I replied. "I just kinda thought here was the right place." Elena nodded lightly, keeping her view on something else. "Is there something you wanted to do instead?" I asked. As much I as I loved it here, I didn't want to make her uncomfortable. She shook her head and carefully placed herself on the nearby bench next to a few other trees. "Suit yourself." I said, trying to lighten up the extremely heavy mood at that point. It was almost making me feel anxious. I started running around through the trees, not knowing what
I was doing, but getting my focus off of Elena and onto anything else. Her eyes drifted all over the place, so I couldn't put my finger on what she was looking at. I just hoped she wasn't looking at me. I slowed down and headed toward the oak tree I practically lived on. This was basically where I grew up. I loved it so, it kept me company when I was alone and comforted me when I was weak. I settled down, turned away from Elena, but I soon realized she had followed me over. "I thought you were sitting over there." I shut my eyes to try and show carelessness, but I really didn't feel that way. All of my hopes in the world were that I really cared. "Well I was thinking I should make the most of the time we have together now." I smiled, looked up and she had the big grin that you could see a thousand miles away. "Of course." I responded. Her and I started walking. No discussion where. We just walked and I guess the wind brought her walking in front of me. I couldn't see her face. Only her army green hoodie with a thick, furry hood. Her cuffed blue jeans and her combat boots. She walked faster than I was used to. Took me a second to catch up. We walked for maybe twenty minutes without talking. She stopped at her house, which was a couple blocks away from mine, she turned around slowly, and her lips began to open, and..... nothing. She looked down. "Sorry, Evan," she said. "I must go, thanks for," There was a pause, maybe a bit awkward for me. "all you've done.", she finished. "All I've done?" I thought to myself. "What kind of answer is that? Whatever I guess." I tried my hardest to say a gracious goodbye and thanks for coming but I think if came out a bit arrogant. Nothing I said would've convinced me.
