Before, I was like them who see love as it is.
Love at first sight. It talks about love that thrive on the outside appearance of a person. I'm hypocrite if I say I didn't experience such a magical thing, that's how they call it. I've encountered that magnetic force pulling my entirety and being magnetized to that thing..And yeah..It felt so right. It felt so good..It felt like that person is already the one..your destiny...but oopps! I only felt those heavenly feelings AT FIRST. Whatever follows is definitely a different story. :P
"I love you and I'll love you forever." So many are they who have been hooked by that line. Overrated line used by madlang people to express how they feel for someone. It seems that they're pretty much sure of their love lasting forever. Its convincing power is proven and tested and as a matter of fact, I,before, was also convinced. hehe. Now, whenever I have an encounter with that pick up line, whenever I hear those words from others (especially from couples but some of them are just in state of MUs.lol) there's something in me that wants to make a rebellion, I want to intrude and say "love you forever?duh? Alam mo ba yang sinasabi mo? What does forever mean to you? a month? a year? a decade?" Okay.Okay. Maybe you're now thinking that I am a hater of the word "forever." No, I'm not. I just don't get the point of telling that word but somehow along the way, they would end up eating what they've said.
We, in our human nature, used to tell someone what we feel based only on the current situation without putting into consideration the what we call "uncertainty of the future." But of course there's always an exception to general rule. And that exception is powered by the word "commitment." Unless you really are into committing yourself to a certain relationship, your desired fairytale-like ending is an impossibility. Before going any further, let us first define what commitment really is. Based on my own understanding (which I humbly subject to correction), commitment is the binding force that gives us stability to endure whatever the circumstance would be. It is actually a will of the mind to standstill despite the impact of the external forces to us. By the way, when I say external forces, I refer to the things that we have no control over. Since it is only yourself that you can control, the rest falls under the category of external forces that I'm talking about. So vast as it is, external force really means something, doesn't it? It is like you against the world. BUT if you really apply the word commitment to your life with my own definition I gave to it a while ago, those external forces cannot shake any part of you. You'll stick to what you've entered into whatever it takes. And that, I think, is one of the secret ingredients of a long-term relationship. (Oops, I already revealed it, that's a secret anyway. Teehee.)
Love is blind. Whoaa!For me that's the scariest definition I've ever heard about love.Taken literally, if love is blind, I might not want to give it a try.LOL. But it's not like that. Love,they say, is blind because when you love, it is like you're entering into another dimension where everything in it seems right to you. What an amazing feeling huh! And when everything seems right, of course, nothing to you is wrong. When you cannot distinguish anymore what is right from wrong, that's the blindness they're talking about. And that's where the main problem comes in. Every creature in this world is two-sided.We have our own good and bad sides. And obviously good side is right. But what about the bad side? Is it still right? Of course not! But sad to say, we often take the bad side as it is, as if it is also right just for us to say that we love our partner; just for us to convince ourselves that we're in the best relationship. We, most of the time, misinterpret this notion about love. We interpret it like this: "Pag mahal mo, tanggap mo kahit sino at ano pa siya." Reality check, as human as we are,we really don't accept the bad side of our partner. Admit it or not, tinitiis mo lang, that's the exact description of what you feel. And when you only are enduring the pain that your partner's bad side is bringing you, you are subject to collapse. The time will come that you find yourself not able to stand it anymore then you give up. And that will be the end of your love story. I feel sorry for that.
But wait, there's more.I'd like you to take note that acceptance is far different from "pagtitiis." Acceptance is when you know that things are not right, you recognize it,you take the bad side NOT as it is, but rather with a different perspective. You accept things at your will by looking at it in another view. To make it clearer, let me use the preaching of one of the pastors in our ministry regarding this matter. He said that "Love sees through the lens of God's Word." And that Word of God can be found in 1 Corinthians 13: 4 - 8. Meaning to say, love uses another lens for which you see things, and so you see things differently." (I hope you understand my point here.^^,)
On the other hand, pagtitiis is when you know that things are not right, you recognize it, AND you take it as it is. You're seeing the bad side of your partner using the lens of your humanly eyes. In that case, you know that things aren't going right, you feel bad for it, yet you do that "tiis tiis" factor knowing, and worse, hardly convincing yourself that you love that person that's why you have to endure the pain he/she brings you. Until the time comes that you feel that you already had enough of it and then BOOM! You will explode like a time bomb! That time, all that you're keeping inside of you for a long period of time will come out in the open and that, as what I've said earlier, will be the end of your love story.
So be careful on how you deal the bad side of your partner. Accept it or TIIS it? It is for you to choose.
So that's all for now. :)
