ok what tHE FUCK? (Josh Dun)

How the fuck?

"Can you clean out the garage on Sunday?" Said my mom from the living room.

"Uh sure, I can take a look at it today actually."
I said while pouring some cereal into a bowl.

I looked at the clock, 8:00 A.M. God, why am I awake this early? I finished up my cereal and let out a heavy sigh before getting to the garage door. I stood there for a moment whining and groaning in my head. I opened the door and walked in with my eyes closed afraid to find a huge mess, I opened my right eye and was relieved a bit to find it wasn't so horrible. Then I opened my left eye but I saw something move to the far left, my heart starting beating quickly but I pushed myself to move my head in that direction anyway.

What I saw made me freeze.
A guy standing there surprised as fuck, waiting for me to say something. I confusedly walked back into my house and closed the door.

Is Josh Dun in my fucking garage??
I started sweating, im fucking going crazy?
I walked back out to my garage, he was still standing there.

"Wh-" I started to say but couldn't continue to speak.
"Please don't yell!" He sort of whispered and held his finger to his mouth to shush me.
I looked at him with my mouth half open and the most confused look known to man on my face.

"whO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!?" I slowly broke out into a scream.
"Oh my god, my name is Josh. I had to hide in here from some people, but it got late and I fell asleep on your couch please don't yell again!" He said really quickly because he could tell I was freaked.

"nO. NOOO. NO THIS ISN'T HAPPENING. THIS IS NOT OKAY! WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE NOT JOSH DUN! NO!" I yelled feeling honestly fucking hurt how dare he.
I started hyperventilating and nearly crying.
"WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU PRETENDING TO BE JOSH DUN NO WHAT THE FUCK GET OUT OF MY HOUSE OH MY JESUS CHRIST!"

"Chill out!! Im so sorry really its me oh my god." He said slowly coming towards me because I was all over the place.

"NO! NO GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME NO!" I continued to yell and started throwing random shit at him. "WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF JOKE IS THIS ASHTON KUTCHER?"

"OW WHAT THE FUCK CHILL! DUDE CALM THE FUCK DOWN I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING!" I Immediately stopped and almost entirely snapped put of my little panic attack.

"Oh my god Ive always wanted to hear you get pissed off. " I said slightly quietly then busted out into tears and dramatically threw myself onto the ground while still continuing to cry.

"You're a fan aren't you?" He said quietly while slowly bending down and reaching his hand to rub my back.

"dONT FUCKING TOUCH ME HOLY SHIT!" I said breathing really heavily.

"Hey its okay please calm down."

"This isn't haPPENING!" I started to freak out again.
"Oh god please don't throw anything at me again. " he said standing back up.
I took a deep breath and sat up.
"Shit Im sorry about that, did I hit you at all?" I said, raising my hand to my face.

"No, thank God you have horrible aim. " He said and cracked half a smile.
He reached his hand out to help me get up.
I audibly squealed and accepted his help.

"Im actually sorry for sneaking into your house, is there anything I can do for you to forget about this?" "Or to just make it up to you for the trouble and the..emotional stress?.."

I made a double chin face and weird noises.
"Um not really Im just sorry I yelled and threw shit at you oh my god. Holy shit actually all I want is a copy of Regional At Best. " I said and quickly smiled but stopped myself because I probably looked like a fucking dork.

He chuckled a little, "I think I can make that happen. "

"Do you want anything? Can I get you breakfast or something?" I said nervously.

"Actually...yes that would be cool. " He said and my heart melted.