Life

1/6/16

10:04,P.M: today was good only minor things that made it bad, I think the only things that made this day bad was Babes not being able to go to school today which sucked plus I didn't even text her till it was the last period of the day. Then there was the floor hockey game God that pissed me off. First we were doing alright then well they caught up which wasn't to bad, I mean they were a team of all upper-classmen so it's no surprise that we lost. I mean yea it sucked to lose but also I found out that the people running the scoreboard cheated for the other team! They changed our score, not by much, but hey lowered it by one while they kept the other teams the same. So that pissed me off but the worst happened at dinner, we found out that my mom has been reported to the human services and that if the house isn't doing good they are gonna take us away. Plus they made a new rule that we can't have any friends over without my mom/supervision and that ultimately means that I can't have babes over anymore but thank God I can go over there. That does suck for my older brother though because his girlfriend lives in Gardener which keep in mind is about 2 hours from where we live. So now he has to always go over there from now on if he wants to see her which is only over the weekends. Then there is my little brother, even though he can be a little shit sometimes I still love him. Even though my older brother can get on my nerve I still love him. But with my younger brother it also affected him because now my older brothers friend who's friends with my little brother as well can't come over anymore, neither can my little sisters friend and multiple friends she used to have over sometimes. Me God this was like a blow to the damn chest. Babes can't come here anymore so I have to be there which could be bad because I turned in a job application recently and am still waiting for a call for a date for an interview. And then mom also said that if the house still doesn't run right we are gonna get taken away. I can't do that I have so many friends that I can't just leave. That's not the last of my problems because when I found out I went to babes to vent and now she's upset about it and when she gets upset she kind of blocks people from helping her which sucks because my personality has that first response for when people are sad I must help them. So yea, plus whenever I text her and she is upset it really doesn't go well. Well at least to me, to me we start to fight and I don't like fighting ever since I was little I've never liked it. So now I'm sitting here typing this and from now on I'm gonna keep logs of everyday to see how it goes. I plan on getting up to clean up my room because I moved it around and I love to move my room it kinda gives me freedom over my own room like I'm boss. But anyway I need to do that, take care of the mess of clothes on my bed I put there to move things in my room. Once I finish that I might clean up around the house even though I'm clueless as to where to put things already. We've been texting for a little bit after we stopped a little bit ago and she want's a break and I mean I don't blame her everytime I find out something that deeply hurts I go to her and vent I mean my house has gone to complete hell after he left. My dad left back in January or Janvier in french. But yea we found out he's was with someone else when he left which got to all of us pretty bad, not so much my little and older brother they didn't really care about him, they didn't have a how do you say good connection with him, unlike me and my little sister. We were hit with freight trains it felt like, I loved him so much and to admit I still do. I miss him a lot and I really want to see him but when ever I think that I want to the anger and rage and hatred come back reminding me of what he has done to me and this family. My little sister still can't let go of him in a way, I mean we found out that she only goes there because he shows her more attention then we do because lets face it; three guys one girl. Not really gonna work out. But now I think she is beginning to realize that he is not worth it at all. I mean I can't say that I got it easy, for as long as I can remember I was his mini-me and we were the best, we used to play wrestle and all that which he got to into a little to often but I didn't mind it's then that I realized pain for me goes away quickly not mater what. Like that time babes threw me over her onto the other side on her bed but with her knee and with my balls. You'd think that would hurt a lot but I was literally laughing my ass off, she was confused as hell, even worried a bit that it hurt me. But yea pain isn't really a big thing for me, I mean yea it'll hurt right there and then but give it like 3 minutes and I'll be all good. Literally. Now that the memories are over for today I can update to what I am doing right now. All I really am doing is sitting here listening to music. I listen to Avenged Sevenfold, Three Days Grace, Falling in Reverse, Disturebed, Skrillex, and Five Finger Death Punch but I haven't added their song yet. But I guess that's it for now I'll continue to do this but with other notes or the same but indented and just label it updates, so yea au revoir monsuier, madame, es madamemoiselle.