"No," she breathed heavily, holding back her tears, "this isn't me." She dropped the picture, and the knife. A single cut on her wrist was red, but not deep. Her mother would ask, she would simple say "Nothing happened, I just accidently cut my arm, but it's fine." Nothing was fine though; in fact, everything that could go wrong, would. She sat on the toilet, crying. She looked at the photograph of her kissing a boy. In her damaged head, few words repeated, "I am bi, I love her." When these words ran through millions of times, she burst into tears, but cried silently.
She opened the bathroom door, and looked at the clock. She buried her face in a pillow and was tempted to scream but was afraid to wake her mother. She knew school would be another day of strong disappointment and nothing in the world could stop that unless... Quickly, her mind went blank, then, filled with the memories of the week before, she smiled; this was the first smile she shed for a whole four days. In her memories, a beautiful, wavy-haired girl turned around from her desk and asked to borrow a pencil. The girl's name was sweet like candy, but repeated like a circle. "Emery", she said out loud. She once again, smiled. It felt good to smile, she longed for the strengthening in her cheek muscle which turned red every time she saw the beautiful Emery. In a daze, she then turned over and had sweet dreams of this girl.
Two hours later she looked at the clock which read four. She couldn't sleep. She grabbed her journal, and started writing. "Dear Journal, you have inspired me to do many things, be many things, and kept me sane all these years. I have a new problem, a new secret, a new heart to spill on your flower-filled pages. The secret that I am bisexual. I now know why I stared at girls, like I used to stare at boys. My secret couldn't be told. I fear everyone would shun me, and turn away. I fear to be hated for what I really am. I fear, that Emery will look and smile at me different; what if she wouldn't smile at me at all. I cant let anyone know, not even my parents. Heaven knows I got myself into a situation that only magic will solve."
She lied down and closed her eyes, in a second she was dreaming of things she wouldn't remember in the morning. In her dream she was surrounded by people laughing, they were laughing at her! She ran into the rain which randomly appeared. She hid in a shack that looked familiar in the dream, but one that she had not seen outside her dream. She gazed at the stars through the small, shattered window. she crouched down, knees on the floor, covered her eyes, and cried. Everyone had known, the secret that haunted her.
YOU ARE READING
Sugar Lips
RomanceChristina was 15 years old under the bed sheets of a boy, but wished to be with a girl. Hidden under a mask; she feared others would look at her differently. She kissed a boy but dreamed of the sugar taste that Emery, a girl from her high school, wo...
