White Rose

one

"Alex, you better not make a fucking peep or mom and dad will hear you." My brother Derek said pulling on my hair as he shoved his cock inside of my mouth. I tried to keep my whimpering down but I did not like one bit of this. What we were doing was wrong and can't stand it. I pushed away from him but his grasp kept me in place. I began to choke and did that make him stop doing what he was doing? No.

"Derek." I gasped and tried pushing back again. This time he let me push back and I fell to the ground. I was choking and gasping for air which was harsh and it hurt my throat. 

"Shut up, worthless piece of trash." He said and kicked me while making his way back to his room. 

I laid on the ground holding my throat and then once I stopped coughing I crawled over to my mirror and looked at myself. I glided a hand down my arm and felt the new born bruises that were sure to show their colours any day now. Some scratches on my stomach. On my back, a lot of scratches and red markings, especially on my rear.

"I am a worthless piece of trash..." I muttered to myself and stood up. 

I made my way to my dresser, pulling out some boxers and a t shirt. I slid them on and continued to stare at myself, pointing out everything that was wrong with me. My phone began to buzz and I picked it up, the name on it said 'Flynn Dawson'. I instantly answered.

"Hey.." I said in a soft tone. Flynn was my best friend since first grade and I always told him everything that went on in my life. He even knew about what my brother does to me and he has promised never to tell a soul and he has kept that promise ever since 7th grade when it all started.

"Hey man, you doing alright?" He said with a concerned tone.

"Yeah... I'm fine.." I lied as I crawled into my bed feeling as if the world was pulling me down, I felt weak but, when do I never feel weak.

"Alex, don't lie to me, I know something is up by the tone of your voice." 

I sighed, "don't worry about me, I can handle it on my own."

"Why haven't you called the cops on them yet?"

"You know why Flynn, don't even ask me that question.. Look, can we just drop the subject?"

"Yeah, sure... Hey you know that guy Charles?"

My heart fluttered at his name, "yes, of course! what about him?"

"I saw him staring at you today in Science." He said that in a sing-song tone.

"W-what? Really?" I said right when my cheeks became warm and turned a light shade of red.

"Yeah! Oh my gosh, what if he likes you?!" He became really excited.

"Are you kidding me? Why would someone like him fall for someone like me?"

"Because, someone like you is meant to be with someone like him."

"What do you mean by that?"

"He's sweet, caring, and thoughtful. You need someone like that that shares romantic love with you.."

"I guess.. Hey, I'll text you, I need to go make myself dinner."

"Ugh, they didn't let you eat again!?"

"Unfortunately, but I got it covered, see you."

"See ya."

We hung up.

I snuck out of my room and tip toed down the stairs trying to be quiet as possible, which I was really good at because I practice this routine every time I am left to starve during the day. I made some ramen which was my favourite food ever, I could eat this every single day but I don't since it is really bad for my health.

Once I finished cooking it I brought it up to my room to enjoy in peace and quiet. I chose to eat it on my roof since my window leads to my roof. I sat there and watched the cars pass by, see children and kids from my school pass by. The sunset was amazing from my view, the sky was painted with many shades of orange and pink. The clouds were a orangey-pinkish colour, they looked like cotton candy.

I thought everything was nice and beautiful until I began to hear yelling come from inside my home. I quickly jumped into my room closing my window and hiding my cup of ramen. I sat on my bed and stared at the entry to my room expecting one of my parent's to come in.

My father stormed in with my brother following him from behind. My stomach clenched as I was terrified of my brother and my father in the same room with me. 

"Your brother tells me that your gay ass was trying to have sex with him?!" My father shouted at me while my brother smirked staring at me grimly. 

"Yeah dad, he even came into my room naked expecting I was going to get with him!" My brother said complaining about it. 

I held back my anger and just looked down. I was lost in thought until my father grabbed my chin to make me look up at him. 

"Don't look away from me when I am talking to you, you little shit!" He said slapping my face so hard I fell to the side on my bed from the impact. "What the hell is wrong with you!?"

I just buried my face in my sheets trying to push the sounds out but I just couldn't. My father kept on calling me names, my brother joined in as well. I tried to hold back but a tear escaped my face and I began to cry and weep. 

My father grabbed me by my shirt and made me look at him.

"Hah what a fag! Beat his ass dad!" My brother said excitedly.

My father smacked me in the face again and threw me on the ground on my back making me loose my breath. They left me trying to be able to breathe again. 

I was able to get my breathing pattern on track. I crawled back onto my bed and cried away my pain. What did I do to deserve this? Why am I always attacked for doing nothing? Why am I treated this way?

I couldn't take the urge anymore, I just had to. I grabbed out a razor from my bedside table, ran to my sink and began to slit my wrist. Tears, staining my cheeks fell onto the blood and the wounds. I almost passed out from the blood loss before I rinsed the blood out and wrapped them in a bandage. 

I laid in my bed and stared at the ceiling of my room. I pulled a warm blanket over me and I cried my final tears until I fell into a deep dark void of sleep.