After all these years... After everything that's happened... After all I've learned, all I've been through alone and with the group...
I'm finally... Happy.
Don't get me wrong, I was happy when we lived in Verion. Before all this shit started. Hell, I even was happy when we lived on the damn ship.
But ever since things have gone to shit, I've been secluded from the group. Left to my own devices.
I lost contact with everyone... I lived out by myself.
But after realizing that all of my life was just a simulation-- a lie-- I couldn't handle it.
But even after that...
I still had one.
One person who still even remotely cared for me.
But during that I was selfish...
I wanted another.
We ventured out... We found him... We pulled him away from the simulation.
Now, I've still lost the first who was by my side for NightWind knows how long...
But as I walk with this man, the one I love... As I walk with his hand in mine, I still cannot get the first out of my mind.
Midnight.
Yes, he was basically just a fictional character.
But some part of me believes we are all our simulated selves in some way.
Xeria... She cannot ever forget Midnight.
She still loves him...
Alas...
She isn't real. He isn't real.
I need to get over it.
But... I... I miss him.
No, I cannot be saying that--
But I did.
And I will.
I.
Miss.
Him.
I'm sorry Taylor... I'm sorry.
I feel as though I'm being torn apart...
Here I am, Neira, and I love the one who simulated the old transgender boyfriend of Xeria.
But "she" is also here... And yet I have the one who she had yearned to keep, she still wants Midnight. The one who brought her from despair... The one who helped her... The only one who truly cared for her and stayed by her side.
She can't forget the times she had died infront of him.
Hell, who wouldn't?
Oh, right, everyone else.
It hurts.
My heart... It feels as though it's a game of tug of war.
He always asks what's wrong, and I smile and shake my head, always responding "Nothing, babe..."
But yet everything is wrong.
Everything.
But now there is nobody to help me...
All those I knew were fake... Not who they were in the simulation.
And he cannot know...
Never...
