Things I'll Never Say

When the Cover is Blown

As if a fire was set to his backside, Mike sprung up ran to the bathroom, coming back with a trashcan in hand. He handed it to me, and I grabbed the sides as he came up onto the bed and sat next to me, pulling back my hair out of my face. Almost instantly, I got sick into the can, vomiting profusely. Mike's soothing touch rubbed my back as my body continued to wretch.

I caught my breath after a few minutes and the feeling seemed to stop. "You okay now, babe?" Mike asked, still rubbing my back.

"I need to get a shower," I mumbled, uncurling my back and slowly sitting up.

"Okay, but I really need to get all of this glass out. You don't want any of that to get stuck or be pushed in deeper. Here, let me take that and I'll help you into the bathroom so we can finish this, okay?"

He held out his hand, looking to grab the trashcan. Willingly, I handed it to him saying,"Okay."

It felt nice to feel cared about so deeply by Mike after having so many falling outs lately. They say the first year is always the hardest, but I never would have imagined it would turn out like this. Although, I didn't question the authenticity of his concern, I knew Mike had other motivations to help me himself besides just being a good man to me. If we were to go to the hospital, questions would be raised; and Mike certainly didn't want us to be seen in public in this sort of state.

After returning the rubbish bin to the bathroom, Mike came back in for me. "Alright, I want you to get up slowly and only move if you feel stable."

Lifting his arm under me, I wrapped mine around his neck and started to get up. After taking a few steps, my head started to pound more than it had before and it felt as if my brain was attacking itself.

"Take your time. We're almost there."

We walked into the bathroom and I felt the cold tile touch the bottom of my feet, sending shivers up my spine. Mike led me to the bathtub, setting my down and making sure I was stable."You okay? Just get ready and start the water and I'll be back. I left the bowl in the room."

He turned, walking out of the bathroom, and I started getting undressed, turning on the water for it to warm up before I put the plug in. Looking down at my bare skin, I noticed all of the bruises that lined my arms, ribcage, and stomach. Tracing them with my finger, I imagined what my face must have looked like if this is what happened to my body. Trying to push the thought from my head, I put the plug in the drain and slipped into the tub slowly.

Mike reentered the bathroom after the tub was completely filled and I had put a dollop of soap in, resulting in a tub full of bubbles. I rested my head against the back of the tub, sinking deeper into the water, as Mike came in and placed the bowl down, resuming his duty of cleaning up my face.

"Ugh, it's so dark in here. Let me go turn on the light so I can see you better."

He turned back around, turning on the switch with a subtle flick of his fingers. Immediately, I covered my eyes as pain started searing through my skull."Ah, Mike! Turn it off!" I grunted through my teeth.

"I need it to see you clearly. It has to be on," he said, and his voice sounded to be coming closer.

"No! Turn it off!" I persisted, starting to feel really uncomfortable.

I heard his footsteps walk away and the sound of the switch turn off. Slowly, I pulled my arm down and proceeded to cover my face with my hands as my head was still throbbing. Following feeling the touch of Mike's hands trying to pull down my hands gently from my face, I heard him whisper,"Demi, what is going on?"

Usually, I'd be scared to say this, but given the circumstances of the situation and the pain I was in, I confessed,"Mike, I need to go see a doctor. I think I have a concussion again."