The Troubled Vampire

Prologue 

It is said, that when a mother gives birth to a child, part of her becomes a piece of the baby. So how, if the mother is supposed to be so close to her child, is she able to leave without any explanation? How is she able to leave part of herself behind and continue on without it?

I was very close to my mother when I was younger. She would sing me to sleep and play with my hair. When my mother was still with us, our family was actually normal. We would go to drive-ins and stay up late playing board games. Sure, there was some fighting, but we never abused each other. No. The abuse came after she left.

After she supposedly died. After she left me to rot with my crude father and prick of a brother. She left me to suffer and she didn't even look back. 

She didn't want me when I was all tattered up and beaten. I wasn't good enough for her then. She had to wait until I found Callum, the man that makes me who I am today. The man that has fixed me, that has made me whole again. She had to wait until I was acceptable. 

So now, as she has risen from the dead, knocking on my door, expecting a welcoming invitation back into my life, all I can think of is how she has betrayed me.

A mother is someone you are supposed to be able to look up at, to idealize as your number one role model. They aren't supposed to be the ones who turn their back on you, who leave you alone to suffer the hardships of this cruel world. 

Because of her, I am scarred and damaged. I was terrified of every male being. I was broken. Unwanted. Trash. Scum. Trivial. Wretched. Because of her, I never had the normal childhood.

But I guess, because of her, I found Callum. If she had not left, I would have had a reason to escape my family. I wouldn't have had a reason to run to California. I would never have met Callum. And maybe, I would never have fallen completely in love like I am now. 

What a contridicting concept. I am to both blame and thank my mother. But both for horrible reasons. Sure the outcome turned out great, but a child never should have gone through what I had.

So, as I start this story, I want you to understand that I do try to look at things through my mothers perspective. Which is exactly why I slammed the door in her face.