"Are you excited to start Keira?" My dad asks.
"I'm not really looking forward to start. I'm quite nervous." I said anxiously.
"Yeah I understand. But I'm sure it's gonna be alright" He replied.
"Yeah, I hope so.."
I'm Keira, 16, and is about to start high school in not so long. I've had a rough time growing up, more specifically, families. I moved to Denmark when I turned 9 and since then, I haven't visited my home country. It was really easy for my to fit in, mostly because I'm very talkative and like able to most people.
I developed depression in the beginning of my teen years. I developed a lot of insecurities because I feel different. I'm short and doesn't really feel good about myself, but people don't know that. I'm quite good at hiding how I feel deep inside. Although people do think they know me, but that's really far from the truth. They only think that, because I thank a lot, but they don't know that I'm hiding some issues deep inside and only the close ones know a little bit of my issues.
I've never had a boyfriend and I don't know the reason why, or so I thought. I develop a lot of trust issues throughout the years, especially towards guys, but I never really knew that, until later on. I never really had a dad nor a mom growing up, mainly because my mom and my biologic dad got divorce since I was little. My mom was always away, where late on, she found a new man and my grandmother took us in since I was 2. My biologic dad hated me. He was a big cheater and never really took care of me. I never understand why he hated me. It does makes me sad from time to time, but there's really nothing to do about it. He always visited my older sister from time to time, until one day it suddenly stopped. Meanwhile, he never even looked at me during those visits. I later on found out, that I looked a lot like him, maybe that's why. Growing up, my sister was always somehow favoured. My cousins and aunties really liked her, but not me. It do hurt. I feel like burden. My mom and my sister was really close growing up. They always talked through the phone and went to trips together, meanwhile, I was just kind of there? Growing up, I really loved my grandmother. She was this vicious lady. I felt like she hated me and i never really understood why. Was it because I looked like my biological father? Every little mistake I made, she uses it against me through hitting. She hit me a lot. It really hurt. But I was somehow eager for approvals. I just wanted to be liked by someone and I feeling of being disliked by a person who was the only one that liked me made me feel sad. I always wanted to do my best for her. I let her hit me, because I didn't want her to hate, just like the rest of my family.
Growing up, I develop a friend. A really good friend. Willy. Him and I were the same age and I loved being with him. Him and I where bestfriends. He was a cute and sweet guy that I laughed a lot with. Him and I didn't really have much contact after going back to my hometown, but I have always remembered him. During the years, he got really sick and ended up being handicap. I knew that, but was so focus on school and friends, that I never really visited him during those years. Even so, he was still my best friend.
I was really good at making friends. I was best friends with a lot of people, but James and Kervi where my closest.
My grandmother develop cancer because of smoking. That was her go to thing to do. But it got worse over time and I had to move to Denmark with my family, so it really hurts to leave her in the hospital bed, knowing she was sick.
I started new school in Denmark. A special school that focuses on learning the language. I had a lot of friends, but during that year, we got a talk from our family overseas of a news that my grandma had died. It really broke me. My grandma was like a mother towards me, even though she wasn't a fund of me, I still love her with all my heart. I wasn't really myself later on that. Throughout the time, i buried my grief and was trying to act like myself again.
