It was just another Tuesday morning.
Unlike some of my basic unemployed friends, I actually had a work at local grocery store. Not as a manager, of course. But, as a cashier. Usually, some people would buy their basic needs during this time of the day. But it isn't like the usual Tuesday, this time they're all barely comes here. I'm not sure why, but damn! Those peasants better be here for it!
"..."
Dezz : "They aren't coming, aren't they?"
I immediately left. No business to just wait around there! I guess I gotta visit José for a while, maybe he knew what to do on this occasional break time.
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José : "It's not really usual for the store to feel like a cemetery."
Dezz : "Fuck you, José!"
José : "What? I'm just sayin'. No reason to be angry, ese! What did you come to this street for?"
Dezz : "I'm just not up for the mood today! You got something good?"
José : "Let me give you this... Big Papa's special booze, the one and only beer!"
Dezz : "Goddammit, ain't it not the right time yet for such shit-scummy act!"
José : "But, we're the scum ones remember?"
Dezz : "Shut up, atleast I'm employed."
José : "Hey, look at that girl over there!"
Dezz : "Damn, she's hot. What'd you got there, hun?"
José : "Damn!"
...
Holy fuck!
She stabbed my eyes with a fucking chopsticks full of peppers.
Woman : "You scum pig, fucking perv!"
Fuck, did I do wrong? Whatever!
Anyway, she left something over there. What's that thing anyway? It's like a pipe. Maybe she's been getting blown by the pipe or some shit!
José : "Holy fuck! We gon' get stoned from this!"
Dezz : "Huh? Stoned?"
José : "Bro, I got weeds in my van. We can fuck it up in here!"
Dezz : "You mean like we fuck in here?"
José : "That's gay, you shit."
Dezz : "Aight', you and me!"
(15 minutes later... )
Dezz : "The fuck did you do, José?"
José : "You're fuck with me or what? You want to leave your stupid boring ass job with some of these? This shit makes your life 1000x better! Try it out!"
Dezz : "Holy fuck!!!!!!"
José : "Let's invite Ty, Gary, Dylan and Carlos!"
Dezz : "No Carlos and Dylan! They fucked my ass back then remember? Fuck them! Don't ever bring them here again!"
(1 hour later... )
Ty seems to be having fun stoned with his anime waifu body pillows. Freaking creep! Gary seems to be enjoying the time naked with Carlos... On the grass. Yeah, they invited the assfucker Dylan too. José seems to be enjoying some alone time in the van. Meanwhile, I'm getting stoned, feels like I should have not been in here with them! These lowlifes are really something else! Fuck it! Everything is red and floating. I'm just gonna turn my radio up instead!
"And now, we're back with some big balls ballad band, Motley Crue! (fuck you) Now, now, Vince Neil said he wants to take us to the top, ain't it right?"
(motherfucking) Vince Neil : "Top of your ass!"
*Drum rolls*
Dezz : "Damn, that fuckin' guitar still sick as fuck!"
Everyone (stoned) : "Don't you know, know, know, it's a violation!"
Carlos : "I wanna get somee moreee stoned... My ass is so 100% ready for next round, papi."
Ty : "God, I'm so stoned! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK! This weed is so good!"
Dezz : "Goddamn it! Everyone is fucking!"
??? : "Everyone! Hands in the air!"
Dezz : "???"
Oh shit! It's the cops! What a fucking hours getting stoned with these bunch of losers.
Cop #1 : "Holy shit, is that Motley Crue on the radio?"
Cop #2 : "Oh yeah, it is! Fuck it, we catch 'em later. I wanna rock with some of theseeee bad boys~!"
(Later, they still got caught though. Morons. Especially, the assfucker Dylan and Carlos. They got no boundaries when it comes to mating.)
Dezz got arrested that evening. He was being put in a jail for the night because of fuck drug possession. But what about José? What happened to him afterwards?
(Later that evening..)
Dezz : "Goddamn it. They got me doing stone shit! I'm so fucking doomed! My job, my family, my whole image!"
José : "Sup', bitch. You got some more room in this cell?"
Dezz : "Man, fuck you! You got me into this mess!"
José : "Sorry, it was a terrible mess we just did. I got some good news for you though!"
Dezz : "What's it?"
José : "Got everyone's key! We can escape through this night."
Dezz : "I ain't escaping for the night! You always got me into this hot mess every fucking DAMN Tuesday!"
José : "I got 10 kilos in my back."
Dezz : "Alright! Fuck you, bastard, I'm in!"
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And they fucked each other through the night with the boys.
THE END!
