A Broken Inheritance

Chapter 60: A Bit of Warmth in the Cold

James's voice dropped, sharp and dangerous. "You don't get to talk to me about real. You don't get to act like you're the only one who gives a shit about her."

Sirius narrowed his eyes. "No. But I do get to be pissed when someone I care about gets backed into a corner."

"She wasn't—"

"Emotionally, James!" Sirius snapped. "You've seen her. You know what she's like. She can barely admit when she's cold, and you dropped a bleeding confession in her lap?"

James stepped back, hands in his hair. "It wasn't like that. She asked. She pushed."

"She's doesn't need that kind of pressure."

"She doesn't have to do anything!" James's voice cracked. "She doesn't owe me anything. I wasn't—" He shook his head. "I wasn't asking her to love me back. I just needed—fuck—I don't know what I needed."

"Then why would you put her in that position?" Sirius said, louder now. "Do you have any idea what kind of pressure she's under? With Riddle breathing down her neck, and half the school ready to brand her dark for breathing wrong—and then you—you, of all people—decide now is the time to make it personal?"

James stood up, hands clenched into fists at his sides.

"You think I don't know that?" he said, voice low and sharp. "You think I haven't regretted it since the second I left?"

"Then why do it?" Sirius asked, exasperated.

"I didn't! That's the whole fucking point!" James barked. "I didn't mean to do anything. She knew, Sirius. She's always known. I didn't say anything she didn't already feel hanging in the room every time we looked at each other. She baited me. She asked, and I—" his voice cracked a little, and he stopped. Swallowed. "I just didn't deny it. That's all."

Remus glanced between them, brows knit. "And then?"

James laughed bitterly. "And then she said she can't offer me anything. That's what I got. No rejection, no comfort. Just... nothing. She looked at me like she already knew how it would end."

Sirius sat down slowly on the edge of his bed, expression hard to read now.

"You should've waited," he said finally. "You should've waited until she wasn't... this deep. Until she could choose. She can't choose anything right now, James."

James looked down, the fight in him faltering. "I know."

They sat in silence for a while.

Remus, as always, was the one to break it.

"Look. None of this is ideal. But don't act like James did this on a whim."

"You've been walking around like a ghost for weeks," he said, turning to James, his voice soft. "Not sleeping, not eating, flinching every time someone says her name. Whatever you said to her, it's not the worst thing in the world to let it out."

James closed his eyes.

"Don't say let it all out," he muttered.

"Why?"

James opened one eye and stared at the ceiling like it had betrayed him personally. "Because I did, and now I want to rip out my own vocal cords."

Sirius huffed, but didn't jump in with another quip.

Remus stood up and crossed the room. Put a hand on James's shoulder.

"I don't think you did anything wrong," he said simply. "Not really. You just feel things deeply. It's not a crime."

James gave a half-hearted scoff. "Tell that to Anastasia."