Thor Odinson x Reader One Shots - Closed

The Pirate of Hearts

The Pirate of Hearts
Request for BoyfriendScenarioLady

"Oh, Thor! Do you remember this one?"
The god in question glances at the photo you're pointing at and smiles with a hearty laugh. "I do indeed, Lady (y/n). That was one of our favorite past times."
"Yes, it was..." you agree with a contented sigh. You lean against your boyfriend's shoulder and close your eyes with a smile. The photo in question was taken when the two of you were quite young, perhaps five or six years old in human years. After hearing a few fairy tales from your father, you and Thor decided to dress up as pirates and run through the palace pretending to pillage and plunder the residents.

Your eyes grew wide as you and your best friend sat on the floor at your father's feet, listening intently to the latest fairy tale he had conjured up. This one was about pirates – human-looking creatures who wore huge funny hats with feathers sticking out of them, shirts with puffy sleeves, and tight leather pants. They always carried swords and pistols around on their persons, in case danger presented itself. They stole everything they needed from innocent townsfolk, which didn't seem right to you, but you were too engrossed in the rest of the story to care. They were master con artists who could trick local villagers into doing or offering the pirates anything they wanted. They were powerful.
"I wanna be a piwate!" you cried when your father finished the story. He laughed and patted your head.
"Of course you do, (y/n). Maybe someday you will be."
He meant it innocently, of course. Anything to make his little girl happy.
"Lady (y/n)," Thor announced, standing up and extending a hand towards you. "We shall be pirates together."
Your eyes lit up even more, if possible, and you jumped to your feet, taking his hand. "Really?
"Really!" he grinned. "Come on, maybe we can get Loki to help us be pirates!"
With that, the two of you ran off in search of Thor's brother.

You found him in his chambers reading, of course. Before you could knock, Thor pushed open the door, much to the younger brunette's disapproval.
"What do you want, Thor?" he inquired uninterestedly.
"Brother!" Thor cried, jumping onto his brother's bed with enough force to knock the book from his brother's hands. "We wish to become pirates!"
Loki raised a brow and set his book on the bedside table. "Pirates?"
You nodded your head excitedly. "My Daddy just towd us aww about them. They wear funny feathewy hats and puffy shirts and weather pants they cawwy swords and guns and they attack viwwages and steal stuff!" (1)
Loki's brow remained raised as he could not figure out why you, innocent little (y/n), would want to be such a rude and dishonest character. "Why do you want to be a pirate?"
"They're so cool!" you insisted, clasping your hands together and lacing your fingers as if to pray. You stood directly in front of Loki, your other best friend, and jutted out your bottom lip in the biggest pout you could manage. "Pwease Woki?"
He couldn't resist your pout – no one could – so he agreed. "Alright, (y/n). I'll make you and Thor look like pirates. Just be careful what you steal."
You threw your arms around the brunette and held him tightly. "Thank you Woki!"
He smiled at your enthusiasm and nodded as you let go. He drew his palms together and closed his eyes, mumbling words you couldn't understand. Sparkling green light materialized between his hands, slowly flowing through the air towards you and Thor. It encircled both of you, blocking your vision. When the lights dissipated, you looked down at your body and squealed with delight. Your regular Asgardian gown was gone and replaced by a white shirt with puffy sleeves, a purple vest, tight black faux leather pants, and black leather pirates boots. Something dark hovered in front of your head and, reaching a hand up to grasp it, you discovered that it was your very own black tricorn hat complete with a large white feather. You squealed again and rushed forward to hug your magician in thanks. He smiled at your excitement and watched as you toyed with your sword and pistol (plastic, of course). He returned to his reading as you and Thor headed out to wreak havoc on Asgard.
"What is our first mission, Captain (y/n)?" Thor questioned you in a loud whisper as you hid behind a clothed table in the dining hall. You blushed at your new title before scanning your eyes around the room.
"There!" you hissed, pointing a small finger at a tray of blueberry muffins (2) on a table on the other side of the room. Your favorite dessert – as everyone knew. Your father requested them at every feast just for you. And you wanted them now.
"Very well, Captain. How shall we get them?" Thor inquired.
You nibbled your lower lip in thought, eyes jumping from grown-up to grown-up, seeing who was paying attention and who wasn't. "You be a distwaction," you instructed Thor, pointing to a group of maids standing beside the table holding your beloved muffins. "Get those maids' attentions! I'll get the muffins."
Thor nodded and sunk to the floor, crawling beneath the tables to maneuver his way to the maids without being caught. Once he was at the edge of the table closest to the maids, he slithered on his belly across the floor, stopping just before the girls' feet. He stood slightly and dove forward, sliding between one maid's legs. Her skirt ruffled lightly in the wind the child created, causing her to blush and press on the skirt with her hands.
"Oh!" she squeaked in surprise, looking around for the culprit. "Prince Thor!"
He tugged at the skirts of the other two maids, gathering their flustered attentions as well. He then ran off towards the guards standing in the doorways of the dining hall with the maids in tow.
You watched the scene from your vantage point beneath the first table. You ducked down and ran under the tables as Thor had crawled, making a beeline towards the muffin table. You dropped to your knees and slid under, hiding in the shadows, looking around to make sure Thor was still acting as a suitable distraction. Your eyes widened when you realized he had been caught! One of the maids was holding onto him, explaining what had happened to Queen Frigga. The Queen looked at her son in surprise, wondering why in the world he would act in such a way.
Feeling guilty for your partner's capture, you sulked out from beneath the table, abandoning your precious muffins with the intent of giving yourself over. Head and arms hung low in shame, you slowly shuffled your way over to the Queen.
"It's my fauwt, Queen Fwigga," you admit softly.
"(y/n)? Whatever do you mean, darling?" she inquired curiously.
"We were pwaying piwates, and Thor asked what ouw mission was. I towd him to distwact the maids so I could steal the muffins..."
Frigga smiled and extended a hand to rest on your cheek. You looked up at her, your big eyes sparkling with childish guilt.
"I understand," she assured you, nodding at the maid to let go of her son. "Now, how did you two become pirates? Surely you do not own those clothes."
"We asked Loki, Mother," Thor admitted. "He agreed because Lady (y/n) asked so nicely."
You blushed and nodded. Frigga smiled. It seemed both of her boys had a thing for you.
"Well, go ask Loki to reverse the magic, and maybe the three of you can play outside," Frigga decided.
"Yes, ma'am," you and Thor agreed together. You ran off towards Loki's room to undo the spell.

"We really did want to be pirates, didn't we?" you recall with a laugh.
"Yes, we did," Thor agreed with a sincere smile. "But do you know my favorite memory?"
You look up at him in silent question, awaiting his answer.
He closes the photo album and sets it aside before planting a kiss on your forehead. "The memories I make every day, being with you."
You smile up at him and rest a hand on his cheek. He leans into your hand before leaning in to kiss you properly.



(1) Wow, it's actually kinda difficult to write with a "l" and "w" speech impediment.
(2) One of my favorite snacks :3