Tug of war

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tug, tug, tug
you pulled on my heartstrings,
making me feel welcome
until you didn't,
never constant
only in small, built-up pieces
that brand me an outsider,
the way you all kept
your secrets from me
and only me,
and when I'd ask
you'd all just laugh;
pretend everything is normal,
a tipping scale of
sincere and crocodile smiles
on my face,
never sticking to one side
because you twist me
up and down
as I try to decide if
I'm friend or foe
just let me know,
because feeling this pain
is more than I can take,
but I know
that I can't let you go,
even as you play a game
of tug of war
with my heart,
tug, tug, tug,

I wrote this a while ago, but I didn't publish it. I'm not sure why I'm deciding to publish it now, but just so you all know, I'm fine now. Also, I haven't been on Wattpad in a really long time, so I don't expect anyone to read this. If you do, however, come across this angry 3am poem, thanks for reading. I love you so much, whoever you are, know that I will always talk to you if you need to vent or literally anything at all! Love you 🫶🏻

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⏰ Last updated: Jun 16, 2025 ⏰

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