Approved by desty
Words by desty
**Cute.** Cute was all I said.
..
He. Was undeniably cute. Was it wrong to think so? "He looks like a Minecraft NPC," Bri always teased, and Jazmenn always confirmed it. Their playful jabs felt like both a compliment and a gentle ribbing. Even Jacky, my friend who moved away under less-than-ideal circumstances, chimed in with her usual nonchalance, claiming that this crush of mine was just a fleeting fantasy.
That was before I truly got to know him. But then my friend Jazmenn, ever the gossip, mentioned seeing him perched in the classes, surrounded by a cluster of giggling girls. The news wrapped around my chest like a vice. And I couldn't help but feel like a ghost looming in the background.
Then, out of the blue, he asked me out on... Halloween.
Could it have been more magical? Maybe. My imagination painted vibrant scenes of us wandering together through the neighborhood, our laughter echoing amidst the rustling leaves, costumes swirling around us as we embraced the spirit of the holiday. But beneath that excitement lurked a nagging anxiety. What if it ended in heartache? If I lost him, I might soon come to loathe the 31st, a date that should be filled with laughter and treats but could quickly turn into a haunting reminder of what could have been.
Yet, the universe had its plans; something always seemed to derail my dreams. Just when I thought the evening would unfold flawlessly, my mom dropped the bombshell: I couldn't date.
Seriously? I was nearly old enough! A world of possibilities lay just before me! It felt suffocating, like being trapped in a room with walls closing in, filled with voices from a world that felt so far away. They couldn't grasp the urgency of the feelings swelling inside me, the rush of a heart racing at the thought of him. Couldn't they understand how it felt when a simple glance from him made my entire day brighter?
First and foremost, how on earth did they find out? I'd taken every precaution to keep this nonexistent to my mother. Yet, my mother had caught wind of it, and the instant disapproval etched on her face shattered my carefully constructed world. And more than anything, why did it feel like my entire existence was under constant scrutiny? Why the fuck couldn't I do me?
With my heart pounding and my stomach in knots, I realized it was time to face my mom. The thought of it sent shivers down my spine, but deep down, she was right. I'm only 14. I'm not old enough to get my heart broken, nor am I mature enough. But that doesn't mean I don't like him.
But these are just my days.
