Flawless

this is so cringe omfg

He promised.

He promised himself that he won't hold onto sadness forever. He was supposed to move on...

And technically he did. A couple of meaningless flings in Hollywood that were supposed to fill the void she left.

It didn't worked though.

Sex with actresses and actors could never compare to their love... obviously.

"I am forever hers." He reminded himself every time. Every time it stung more. Like poking a healing wound.

Two years passed since Coilette passed away tragically during their wedding. On the inside, Calculon lived normally. Being his usual obnoxious "diva" self. But who knew what was going on behind the closed doors?

Well... no one. Calculon would never let himself open up to someone. Calculon was always a really overly emotional individual, he was lamenting about every other tiny incovidence. But now it was different, it wasn't a small incovidence. It was the love of his life... It was Coilette. He wasn't sure himself why he couldn't bring himself to talk about her to anyone... He was a big, strong manbot who had no weaknesses...

And yet... Calculon found himself thinking about her again. It was middle of the night, and despite he needed rest, he couldn't bring himself to lay down and shut down his processors.

He was staring at a wall in front of him, sitting in a fancy looking bed. He sighs. After a long moment of almost painful silence he begins his speech. He often talked to himself. He convinced himself it was a trait from being an actor.

Focusing on...

"Oh Coilette... If only you knew how much I miss you." He begins. His tone of voice was monotone, as usual, but this time with a deep emotion hid behind it. "Ever since you left u can't stop thinking about you. I can't bring myself to love again."

"You were like a blooming flower in a dying garden. So beautiful... giving so much hope." Calculon started gesticulating softly, another trait from being a soap opera actor. "I knew I wasn't supposed to pick you up. I knew you would die, just like every other flower in that godforsaken, rotten garden."

"But I did. I wanted you close, I wanted you to be mine. Admiring from afar wasn't enough. And when I picked you up, you were as beautiful."

"Flawless."

"I fell for you so deeply. I cared about you, I spoiled you even... I kept you healthy. Just to watch you rot... die." His voice begins to tremble, it grew with all those emotions he tried to burn deep down. "And when I lost you, it was too late. You became just another rotten flower... But God, even after your death, you were so beautiful. And I still saw you as flawless."

"And even though I wasn't responsible for your death... it was something no one could have predicted or prevented... I couldn't help but blame myself. I could've told you so many things, I could've done so many things, while I still had time. While I still had you."

"Now it's too late. You won't hear my words, no matter how loud I will say them. Maybe...

Maybe I wasn't supposed to pick you up in the first place."

"But I did." His vision goes blurry and unfocused as tears fills his optics. He wiped then away, not wanting to seem weak... Even though no one was around.

He lied down, closing his optics. He then muttered something that came of weak...

"Goodnight, my beautiful flower. I miss you. And I'll love you till the day I die."

His optics opens and he grimaces, as much as a robot can.

"That was a stupid thing to say. I died like two times by now."

He sighs and groans as he rolls onto his side. He closes his optics again and whispers.

"...I love you."