Lucky in Love (A Reality TV Romance)

Seventeen (the first group date)

-*-

"Um... how deep is it?" They've been provided with bikinis if they want them, and a little screen to change behind, and Alex took the suit at least, but... There are many reservations.

Kai laughs, and he has a gorgeous smile, seriously. "I promise you won't hit your head on the bottom. It's deep enough, you can dive right in and not touch ground. Totally safe, people do it all the time."

That doesn't help. Though he makes a good point that, if she were jumping, she'd want it to be deep. She hadn't even considered that. It's not about the height, it's about the water. She doesn't like water where she can't touch the bottom. Or even see the bottom. She just... doesn't like it.

"Who's up first?"

Will steps forward with that challenging smirk she so often has (and goddammit, arms again), and shoots off a "See you at the bottom!" before she gets her running start and swan dives down.

"Oh my god," Heather whispers, face gone white. She scoots closer to Alex, because apparently that's her role now, the comfort object, and Alex gets an arm around her, still watching Kai.

Lizzie is up for it, too. And Ashley C. Brittany spends a while paused at the top, unspeaking, but then does it. Emma jumps and squeals all the way down. Carlee goes on about how worried she is that her top will come off - shooting eyes at Kai the whole time - until a producer offers her shirt back, and then Carlee pouts and jumps anyway.

"Alex?" Kai turns expectantly.

Her face goes through a series of emotions, even if Alex isn't quite aware of them. Regret, fear, hope, shame... a number of things. Finally she manages. "I think Heather might need someone to walk her down."

"You sure?"

And then he strips off his shirt, and Alex is reminded of just how good a motherfucking eight-pack looks. And as wistful as she is, she looks down. Goddammit. "I'll meet you at the bottom," she mutters, feeling like an idiot.

-*-

"It's just— It's complicated. I don't like talking about it when I hardly know someone." -Alex (♠A)

-*-

Kai watches her for a moment, looking confused and concerned. "...Okay."

Alex spends the whole walk down feeling so stupid. She's been bungee jumping for Christ's sake, she could jump off a frickin' waterfall. And yet... she can't. She couldn't. Her brain is going in circles, that self-criticizing spiral, even as Heather is thanking her for the company, so she doesn't have to walk down alone.

When they reach the bottom, Heather lights up again and immediately shimmies out of her shorts and runs into the water.

Alex, however, stands at the shore. She sits on a rock, dips her feet, and watches the rest of the girls splashing and having fun. Snapping twigs and crunching rocks only make her more aware of the cameras focusing on her, zooming in on her solitude. She just closes her eyes for a second, tries to push away the thoughts that come to her whenever she's near water like this. One of the girls shrieks and Alex winces, turning her back on the pool, her heart thudding anxiously.

-*-

"Alex is just sitting there, looking like she had a bad breakfast or something. Like, so antisocial. I don't know what's up with that, when every other minute of this she's been so upbeat." -Lizzie (♠8)