in your dreams

making a list, checking it twice

"Come on Soleil, you gotta stop this crying. You gone make yourself sick." I put my hand on her back and she shrugged it off.
"I don't care. I want mama."
I sighed, grabbing the bridge of my nose with my fingers. "Your mama not here Soleil."

"Well call her. Cause you mean and she not."
Now I knew she was well past upset. She never cried for Aisha, no matter what was going on. We know she loved us the same, she was just the biggest daddy's girl in the world. And Salem loved him some Aisha so it was okay.

"I'm not mean Soleil, you gone hurt daddy feelings."
"Good!" She yelled before looking at me with tears in her eyes. "Cause daddy hurt Soleil feelings too."

She turned her head back into her cover and I could've broke down right there.
"Well daddy sorry So-So."
I got no response from her, so I knew she was ignoring me now. I didn't think I would have to deal with this until she was a teenager.

I went back downstairs and Salem was sitting on the couch watching tv. I went back in the kitchen and Aisha was coming through the door.
"Why you look like somebody just ran over your puppy?" She whispered. She was holding bags in her hand so I knew she was tryna hide gifts.
"Your daughter don't love me no more." I said pouting.
"It couldn't have been that bad Dre."
She turned around and put the gifts in a random closet that we knew neither of the kids would go in.

"So what happened?" She asked, walking back towards me, her coat and shoes gone.
"I'm sure Salem told you on the phone."
"He only told me what she did to him. Not what she did to you," she replied with a laugh.
"She threw her food halfway across the kitchen A. You should've seen her."
"I can only imagine."
"And then when I put her in timeout, she acted like it was the end of the world."
Aisha rubbed across my back. "Then I had the nerve to bring Santa in it."
She fake gasped, "Not Santa."
I nodded my head sadly. "Then she asked for you."
Aisha stuck her lips out in an actual pout before holding her arms out for me. I sunk into them and slid my arms around her waist.
"I know that tore you up huh?"
I smacked my lips before gently pushing her. "You playing and I'm forreal. My little girl not fooling with me no more."
"Both of yall will be okay." She gave my back another rub and then let go. "Where my two favorite people at?!"

"Mama!" I heard Soleil and Salem both yell and soon little feet slapping against the floor as they ran to Aisha.
"Hi my babies," Aisha replied as she crouched to hug them both who had their arms tight around Aisha neck. Aisha looked at me with a questioning expression and I waved her off.  
"How was time with daddy?" She asked. No one said anything and you could almost hear a pin drop. Salem let go of Aisha and walked back over to me, reaching up so I could pick him up.
"Let's go in the living room Say."
"Ok daddy. Let them have girl time."
I couldn't help but laugh, cause who taught him that.

I could hear Aisha asking Soleil questions and just getting silence in return. I finally heard a whine come from Soleil and then muffled cries.
"Daddy was mean to me," I could hear her crying from the other room. It hurt my heart to hear my baby say that about me.
"I'm sure he didn't mean to. What happened?"
"I had to go in timeout."
"Timeout? Oh no, how long?"
"3 hours!"
"I don't think it was 3 hours Rain," Aisha replied with a laugh.
"It was a long long time and he said when Santa come to our house, he only leaving presents for Say, and not me." She was crying even harder at the thought of Santa not leaving her anything, making me feel even worse.

"Rain, I told you that you had to start acting right or Santa was gonna put you on the naughty list."
"But I was!"
There was silence before I heard Soleil whisper a sorry, knowing her mama gave her a look.

"I just wasn't hungry and daddy kept telling me to eat."
"Well why didn't you just say that instead of throwing your food everywhere?"
Nothing was said and I could picture Soleil just shrugging her little shoulders