⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𝒊.𝒙. 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤

137 8 2
                                    

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐞𝐧
━━ 𝒘𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌

As soon as Aria heard the elevator, she bolted up, hitting Simon with her elbow in the process, and ran towards it. She stood in front of it, debating herself whether to yell at or hug whomever appeared, but she stopped on her tracks when she saw Jace's condition. He seemed beaten, completely drained of energy and emotion.

"Where the fuck-?" she began, but then he then looked up and his eyes connected with Aria's. And that was the first time ever that Aria had seen Jace Wayland cry. She fell silent immediately, her words suddenly caught on her throat.

She took a step forward, unsure whether Jace would want any physical contact at the moment, but it was him who hugged her that time. He hugged her so tight that, for a second, Aria's breath was knocked out of her lungs, but she soon adjusted to it and both of them stood there for some minutes, Aria's hands moving to the back of Jace's neck as he sobbed into her shirt.

"Come with me," she whispered and, taking his hand and leading him as if he were a lost little boy, she walked to her room and sat with him on the bed. He took her legs and pulled the girl closer to him, hugging her once more as she continued to leave soft strokes on Jace's blond and tangled hair.

Minutes later, when Jace had managed to calm down thanks to Aria's assurances that he was safe there, that no matter what had happened outside he would always be safe at the Institute, Aria told him to lay down and wait for her.

She exited her room and walked to the Infirmary, where she woke everybody up (including Alec, Magnus's remedies seemed to have worked after all) and told them that Jace had come back and that he was resting in her room. Everybody urged her to bring him there, but they allowed her to care for him once she told them that he was clearly in a bad mental condition. After hugging Alec and telling him how glad she was to see him awake once again, she ran to the kitchen and prepared the boy a hot tea, which she brought to him with some biscuits.

Jace remained in her bed, laying on his side and covered with Aria's sheets up to his chin. When he heard her walk in, he sat straight. His eyes were red but, at least, he had stopped crying.

"Are you feeling better?" Aria's tone was soft as she sat down besides the boy and handed him the drink. "Do you need something? I can run a bath if you want."

"I've met my father today," he said, leaving Aria completely speechless. As far as she knew, Jace's father was dead, which is why he had been brought to the Institute when he was a kid. "Valentine. Valentine's my father and I–"

"And you are nothing like him," she assured him, making a great effort to not let the surprise reflect on her face, "if that is what worries you."

"How can you know that? You weren't there tonight."

"I wasn't. But I've been here, with you, for ten years. You have been my first everything, my best friend and even my greatest enemy at times. I know you, Jace, and you are not like him, not in the slightest."

"And Clary is my sister."

"What?" That time, she was unable to stop herself.

Jace simply nodded and both of them stayed silent for some minutes. It was obvious that Jace did not want to talk about what had happened and, therefore, Aria respected his wishes and gave him all the time he needed to drink his tea.

"How can you do this?"

"Come again?"

"How," he began again, "are you able to care for me after everything that's happened in the past few days? After all I've said to you and after all I've done to you and–"

"Because I love you, Jace." Aria turned to look at him and he saw his features harden. "Not in the way... well, maybe yes in that way but, above all, I love you as a best friend, as the person who has been with me no matter what happened. I don't want to say a brother because... you know. But I love you, Jace, and that matters more than anything."

"I love you too, Aria. I don't know how, I don't know in what ways yet, you know I'm not good with these things but but... I want to discover them. Certainly not as a sister," he tried to joke. "So... what happened between us... it wasn't whatever?"

"How the fuck would it be whatever? You know me well enough to know that it wasn't."

"Why did you say it was, then?"

"I was... do we have to talk about this now? I don't think you're..." Aria stopped herself. Jace seemed to have gone through a lot that night and she did not think it was the time for such a heavy conversation.

"Please," he whispered. "Today... for a moment, I thought I would never see you again. I need to know. I need to make things right."

Aria nodded, but stood up before speaking and went to her bathroom to fetch a wet towel so that she could clean Jace's face, which was full of dust and dirt. She sat down close to him, so close that their knees were touching, and began softly wiping his face as she spoke. "Long story short, I went to Izzy."

"I thought you knew better, Aria," he chuckled, making the girl chuckle as well.

"The full story is that... well, I already knew why you had come to me that night. I knew it while we were together but I didn't want to admit it. I thought that... that being together would make you realise that I was still there, that I had always been and not Clary."

"Aria..." he whispered, but she shook her head and asked for him to let her finish.

"When you left my room... I went to tell Isabelle because I knew that she would tell me what I didn't dare to tell myself. That you didn't want me. Not really. That you only wanted someone because things had not turned out as you wanted with Clary. I... I don't want to say I felt used because I had agreed to it. But I needed you to know that I could be as feeling-less as you were about it all, especially after seeing her come out of your room.."

"I wasn't feeling-less. When I came back to my room, I couldn't wipe that stupid smile off my face. And it angered me because I didn't want that to happen. Then Clary came to my room to tell me about the Cup and... when you came and told me it was whatever... I think my heart broke a little. And I don't know if it was because it hadn't been whatever for me or because I had made whatever of something that I knew was a special moment for you."

"It's okay, Jace," Aria whispered once she finished wiping his face. "It's water under the bridge. What matters now is that you're okay."

"I don't want it to be water under the bridge, Aria. I don't want us to be water under the bridge."

"We can just... let it flow, okay? Take it slow for a bit. Would that be okay?"

Jace nodded and lifted his eyes to look at Aria. "Can I sleep here tonight? Nothing... nothing has to happen. I just don't want to be alone."

"Of course. Do you want to shower? I'll bring you your pyjamas."

"It's okay, I just want to stay here for a bit," he spoke, slowly. "Can you stay with me? Please."

Aria did not speak. Instead, she got into bed with Jace and hugged him as tight as she could. He allowed himself to be held for some seconds, but then he turned around and looked directly into Aria's eyes, the only sound their encompassed breathing. Neither of them uttered a single word and, soon, both of them fell asleep, their hands intertwined.

lxngbottom speaks!

well, there it goes!! this story
is now finished and it remains
one of my favourite ones

i hope i can go back to writing
soon (life's kicking my ass rn)
and continue jace's and aria's story

for now, thanks for all those of you
who have given a chance to this story
you're amazing and ily xx

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