Fall Apart- R.J.L

remember me, please?

"Now Ms. Malfoy, you have undergone intense, traumatic torture. I'm afraid during this they altered your mind, your memories. You seem to remember some people you used to love very dearly as your torturers, or as people who are out to hurt you. Today, we would like to try and correct this. Now we cannot simply give you back your memories, what we are going to do is show you some of your memories through the eyes of the other people in them. We hope, through this therapy, you will be able to recall your original memories."

"And if I refuse?"
"Well...that is your choice of course, however if you refuse these memories so kindly donated will go to waste and you may never remember the truth about your life. The longer we leave this the harder it may be to return your mind to it's best state. So, would you like to go ahead with the treatment?"
"Fine, whatever. It's worth a try."

They place the bowl Infront of me and instruct me to place my face in it. I do and for a second it feels like I'm falling a thousand feet and drowning all at once. Then, I land. Air returns to my lungs. I'm standing in what looks like a sort of living room. Everything is decorated red and gold, there's a fireplace lit but I'm alone. I can see myself, like I'm floating outside my body. The me in the memory looks young, very young, only 11 or 12 maybe?

It's night, the sky outside the windows is dark and rain pounds on the glass. There's a crackling fire but the room is empty except for my tiny figure curled up in an armchair with a book in the crook of my elbow and a cat on my lap.
I look...happy? Sort of? I look content.

I hear footsteps and suddenly there's a boy in the room. He too looks young, his jumper is far too big for him and his hair is a little bit too long and a tousled mess. His body looks like it was stretched, his limbs long and gangly. He looks...soft, warm, familiar.

"Hey." He says softly.
"Oh, hi Remus."
Remus? That can't be, this can't be Remus? The man who hurt me? The man who tortured me?
"What's wrong Teddy?" No one's ever called me Teddy, I don't remember this at all.
"Nothin, just couldn't sleep." I mumble, putting down my book and fiddling with my fingers. I can't seem to look at him.
"Me neither." He sighs and looks himself down on the sofa beside my chair looking at me with a grin.

"What?" I ask him.
"Nothin?" He grins wider.
"What?!"
"Nothin really just- you're reading the book I have you."
"I had nothing else."
"I thought you said it was silly."
"Well...it got better."
"I knew you'd like Austen once you have her a real chance."
"I like this bits where she talks about how stupid and annoying boys are."
"Oh suuureeee definitely not the bit where Darcy processes his love for Lizzie."
"HEY I HADNT GOT TO THAT!" I smack him over the head with a pillow and he laughs warmly, joining in on the pillow fight until we descend into a fit of laughter.

"Hey first years, to bed. Immediately!" Some grumpy prefect snaps at us from the stairs.
Before I walk up to bed I give Remus a tight hug and he rubs my back softly before smiling at me and we both walk up the stairs.

Suddenly my world is spinning, everything descends into a whirl of black, inky water and I'm dropped into another room.
It's a library, I'm a little bit older, surrounded by stacks of text books and parchment.

"Remus you haveee to help me, you're friends with her. You can talk to her for me, make her hate me a little less!"
"James I'm not going to jeopardize my friendship with lily for the sake of your love life, forget it mate. Oh Teddy!"
"Shhh, studying!" I snap, not even lifting my head to glance at him.
"Oh Teddy Teddy my dearest Teddy, please take a break from potions to save my future would you?"
"Bugger off James." I grumble, rightly so, little prick.