{ picture in me }-kawoshin

prologue

     there wasn't much to say about shinji, he didn't have some crazy destiny or responsibility set out for him, nor was he that intelligent or artistic, he was just normal, he wasn't funny, shinji wasn't even that nice to people.
this would sound really mean to say to someone if it were someone else saying these things but it wasn't another person, just himself.
so it wasn't that big of a deal.

•

     shinji was laying on his back on his bed with his phone held closely to his ear,

"shinji, aren't you kind of excited for tomorrow? new year, new classes, you know?" asuka sighed pleasantly.

shinji tensed up, being reminded of the dread he felt throughout today.
"uhm, maybe.. i dunno." shinji shrugged in real life as he picked at the painful hangnails on the tips of his fingers.

asuka paused before she responded, "shinji. you're a teenager, like me. you're supposed to be excited for these kind of things, don't be boring." she groaned.

shinji payed no attention to what she had to say to him, he was preoccupied by worrying about starting school tomorrow.

"you know, i don't know why i called you. i should've just called mari.. or maybe rei- she would probably be better at relating than you ever do." she huffed after the lack of shinjis response. "god, you're not even answering me, jerk."

".. sorry." shinji finally replied, even though he was too tired to care for asukas nagging.
'gosh, she's so dramatic' he thought to himself.
shinji sat up in his bed, swinging his feet over the edge.
"i'm just tired, asuka. i'll talk to you tomorrow at school, okay?" he rubbed the bridge of his nose.

asuka let out a long and exaggerated groan, "ughhhhh, fine. whatever, i'm tired too. but, i'm not leaving for you, i'm leaving because i'm tired." asuka didn't even say bother to say goodnight or goodbye when she ended the call.

shinji wasn't planning on it either, he just didn't want to deal with asukas criticism of his attitude, knowing damn well it was 11:36 at night and they had to get up at 6.

shinji liked his sleep as much as he liked not being around asuka,

'that's mean.' he thought.
but, it was the truth.

shinji reached over to turn off his bedside lamp,

a lot of kids were excited to start a new year of school, it was a normal thing to do.

but, shinji was having a hard time telling whether the pit in his stomach was excitement, or the dread of changing his usual routine and comfort.