Depths of my Mind

Bus ride

July 2, 2023

I started to love the walks
the sunsets,
the bus rides,
the rain,
the songs,
the peace.

i wanted to take you to places I knew you'd like,
but now i wouldn't be able to.
i can only watch you from afar.

talks that lasted hours,
but too afraid to say a word now.

it was never clear if it was over now,
or if there was ever something to begin with.

i see you in everything.
things that were normal,
places that i used to go to.
now are like fragments of memories from a lifetime ago.

now i go to places i would've taken you to.
do things i would've loved to do with you.
i can only ever dream of talking to you again.

its just gone.
and it's my fault.

sorry.

it hurts thinking about you being with someone else
but i don't have the right to.
you deserve to be happy, and i don't want to bother you.

i know it.
i understand why you wouldn't to be associated with me anymore.
this was a result of me being refusing to acknowledge my mistakes.