A Bastard's Love | [ON BREAK]

Part V: Am I cursed?

The princess had moved back after she noticed her father's deteriorating health, and it was better for her children to be where they would rule one day.

"Mother?" Rhaenyra looked up from her letter she read each night to see Luke looking at her with uncertainty. "Sweet boy." She smiled, motioning him over, and he obliged.

"What is it?" The princess asked with a slight smile. "Is Visenya my mother?" The question caught the princess off guard.

"Why do you ask?" Rhaenyra deflected. "She taught us how to fight, how to fly, and she is always there for us. She cares for us, I remember the times she's fought anyone who questions us or you." The boy explained as if it was obvious.

"She's been here more than Father or Ser Harwin." Jace said, and Rhaenyra looked up at her eldest son who stood a few feet away and smiled, he smiled back.

He had her lover's lips, his smile nearly identical save for the fact that Visenya's was more lopsided, formed that way after falling of Daegor at the tender age of six.

"Can we have this talk when she's here?" Rhaenyra asked, and the boys shared a look before nodding.

A knight called as he rushed past the room. "Daegor has been spotted." The three Targaryens worried for the lack of announcements of Daegor's rider, and all ran outside to see Syrax and Daegor brushing up against one another.

"Where is Ser Visenya?" Rhaenyra demanded, looking around frantically but found nothing, and she rushed to the dragon.

"Daegor!" She called to the mighty dragon. The dragon looked at her and then after the look of recognition lowered himself. A part of her hoped to see Visenya there but found nothing, only a letter for her.

It had been a few years since she received a letter. Was it three? Maybe five? She wasn't sure. Her heart was hammering, tears forming.

Fumbling to open it, her eyes scanned it three times. She wanted to know it was her lover's handwriting. After she was sure, only then did she take the words in.

My dearest Nyra,

My father and his wife had taken me after King Viserys relieved me of my post. They took me to join them in their joyous days of childbirth, I assume that.

While I am excited to meet my other brother or sister, my heart can not help but ache for you. It has been too long, you don't write back and it concerns me.

So, to ease my mind, I sent Daegor knowing he would be sure to deliver the message. Ravens have not always been my first choice of messenger, Dragons being more convincing and trustworthy.

I hope our boys are still well. I miss them dearly.

How is our Jace? Is his training still going smoothly? And our Luke? Has he mastered High Valeryon yet? Our little Joff? Has he learned anything new? Are they all growing faster than we had hoped? Are they all smart and brave as a Targaryen should be?

I will return to you as soon as I can, my love. I know I said it two years ago, and you have not replied since. I fear for the worst.

I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me for my absence and actions. I hope the boys aren't mad that I am absent.

I am not ready to come home. The blood on my hands seems to haunt me.

The other night, I dreamt I caused you harm and I dreamt I had struck the boys. I have not slept well since. But I promise I will not hurt you or our boys. I hope you know that.