The Red String of Fate

15. "I Can't"

"We'll be fine Ryeon" Jungil shattered the carefully built barrier of silence between them, outwardly acknowledging the conflict they were both having internally. Ryeon just stood up and wrapped her arms around Jungil's neck and embraced him. "I know" she whispered against him, pulling herself back and holding his gaze and forming a small smile on her lips.

Jungil reciprocated and led her out of the bathroom and stopped in front of his door. Giving her a peck on the tip of her nose, he sent her out to not tardy her anymore and breathed out a sigh of relief as he was finally back home, with Ryeon.

Immediately teleporting to her office, she saw Ryungu already there and came up with an excuse for being late. "Sorry, I slept in" she huffed out, immediately finding her way to her desk. Ryungu continued to follow her movements and saw how she no longer had the prominent look of sorrow and scrunched his eyes to try and figure out what could've pushed this change in demeanor.

Feeling a pair of eyes on the back of her head, Ryeon slowly looked up from her desk and saw Ryungu scrutinizing her. Trying to lose any unwanted attention that could cause her to slip up and say something she wasn't supposed to, she quickly blurted out an excuse that would do just the opposite.

"I...uh stayed out late last night" without a chance of Ryeon taking back her words and saying something that would make sense, given how Ryungu saw her go inside last night, I mean he called her to basically go back inside, he cut her off. "I saw you go inside, senior" He let out in a monotone voice, continuing by letting his thoughts vocalize

"When Senior Jungil came back.." Ryeon immediately drew the line and interrupted him. "Let's not cross the line, Ryungu" Ryungu immediately understood and replied with a quick "Yes ma'am". Ryeon and Ryungu had known each other for centuries and Ryungu knew her words were never anything harmful, he understood she valued her privacy the most and would never dare to try and cross that line.

Turning his chair to face his desk, he looked down at his papers and let his lips form into a slight smirk for only a moment before he let them rest but little did he know Ryeon shared the same expression, thinking 'This kid really'. Ryungu was like a child to her, that was something that would never change, regardless of what Jungil thought...

Which brought her to think about Jungil. 'He's right. We're not supposed to even exist as one... where does this leave us in the eyes of the one above?..' Allowing her thoughts to cloud her mind for a few moments, she was immediately pulled back into reality when Ryungu asked her a question. "Do you think Senior Jungil holds a grudge against me?"

Ryeon was not only shocked that Ryungu asked her a question regarding his good graces with someone he never really cared for but also by the way they were both thinking about the same person. "Don't worry about it too much Ryungu, if he took the punishment for you it'd be hard to say he doesn't like you..."

Ryeon tried to make a plausible explanation but Ryungu refuted it by mentioning the fact that the actual experience of being in hell could create resentment for Ryungu which Jungil never had and "He didn't take the punishment for me, he did it for you Senior." Silence. Ryungu contemplated whether to continue or not and decided to wait until Ryeon said something.

"...Let's focus on the agenda for today" Ryeon breathed out, putting an end to the subject at matter and making a mental note to ask Jungil about it later. "Got it" Ryungu replied, a bit dejected but still satisfied that he got to bring up something that bothered him to Ryeon.

Quickly moving to inform her of all the subjects they had on the roster for the day, they discussed their plans for how they would approach certain subjects and went on 2 missions. Coming back at a late time as convincing the 2nd subject took longer than anticipated, Ryeon didn't mind as they succeeded in not having any premature deaths due to su!cide.

"Good work today," she told Ryungu as they cleaned up the office and gathered their things to head out. Ryungu bowed to Ryeon and headed out of the small office to head to the Jumadeung food court to get dinner. Ryeon watched as Ryungu left and felt a sense of pride. Smiling to herself and walking to the sleeping quarters to go to her room to wash up and change before heading to Jungil's place.

With a beige sweatshirt and black and white plaid PJ bottoms, Ryeon knocked on Jungil's door and nervously looked around to make sure no one was in the hallway, trying her best to keep her face hidden. Jungil quickly came and opened the door, though his face wet from what seemed to be a nighttime routine(?) but Ryeon didn't mind, at all.

Smiling upon seeing each other's faces, Jungil held Ryeon's hand against his lips and kissed it, earning a light push against his chest from Ryeon. "You're crazy" Ryeon huffed out as she looked around, still outside his door, and pushed him further into his room. Laughing at her reaction, Ryeon jokingly scowled at him and closed the door behind her.

Letting his laugh die down, they embraced each other and breathed out sighs of relief. Jungil whispered against her ear "Do you want to talk about this morning?" Ryeon immediately pulled herself back and denied it. "Let's pick up that conversation another time, I want to talk about something else.."

Jungil stared at her and allowed her to skip over the topic as she was the one that brought it up; Once again, following her pace. "Like what?" He asked, regarding her earlier statement. "Ryungu" Jungil drooped his head and immediately began to apologize. "Ryeon, I'm sorry for what I said, I was upset and let my insecurities get the best of me-" Ryeon corrected him by letting him know she wasn't talking about that specific incident regarding Ryungu but they could still talk about it.

"I- I wasn't talking about that incident but we can talk about it too-" Jungil looked at her in confusion but before he could question her, Ryeon reiterated the words he said to her the last time they saw each other before he went to hell. "You asked me if I was in love with Ryungu," she said, adding distance between the two of them but Jungil quickly closed the distance

"No Ryeon, I asked if you loved him, which was a stupid question because of course you love him, Ryeon."
"I do, Jungil just not in the way-"
"No, I know Ryeon, I was just upset and at the time felt like you fought for Ryungu more than you would ever fight for me.." Ryeon stared at him, not knowing whether or not to correct him because she wasn't sure what he said was necessarily wrong.

"But I get it now. It's not a competition, it never was. I was trying to race with nobody and tired myself out. You love him and you love me, that's it. There's nothing to question Ryeon, and I'm ashamed I ever did." Jungil squeezed her hands that were in his and looked into her eyes to reassure her. "Never again" he whispered out.

Ryeon pushed herself into his chest and wrapped her hands around his broad back. "Mmm" she let out as Jungil reciprocated by wrapping his hands around her neck, feeling guilty for his past actions and trying not to let any unanticipated tears fall. "I understand" Ryeon let out, regarding where Jungil stood with Ryungu, and smiled up at him. "Hm?" Jungil let out and asked what was the other thing about Ryungu she wanted to talk about. "Nevermind, I got my answer," Ryeon said, feeling content that the two most important men in her life were on good terms.

"Cute" Jungil chuckled as Ryeon continued to smile up at him. Walking around her to go get his sweater, he asked her if she wanted to go get food. "Sure" She replied, staring as he put his sweater on, admiring the build of his body. "You think we can go to the food court without getting caught?"

Still in a daze, Jungil called her name and she shook her head and gave a small smile when she saw she was caught staring. "Ryeon~" Jungil whined and laughed, playfully asking her to pay attention. "Okay okay we'll be fine, it's almost 11 but that means we also have to hurry, they close at 11"

"Alright let's go," Jungil said and let her walk out the room first and snuck behind her to grab her hand. Like children, they giggled as they walked down the hallway as Ryeon tried to get them to laugh softer which only made them laugh more. "Shhhh" Ryeon grinned behind the index finger that rested in front of her lips that Jungil tried to kiss regardless of not being able to really kiss her lips.

"You're crazy" Ryeon snickered as they turned the corner to head to the stairs. "For you, yes" Jungil replied, earning a smile of content from Ryeon, who felt like her heavy heart no longer had a place in her life, which for a long time, she thought would never leave her, but it did. Because of Jungil. Park Jungil.
—- author note —-
Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed, don't forget to ⭐️ and boost my ego by commenting! Until next time~