I know im terrible, i know im awful. But i dont wanna die alone, why am i so overdramatic, i cant control my emotions and they got the hetter of me, i make everyone miserable and i know they should just leave me to rot, yet its a pain, i dont wanna be alone. But i cant help anyone, and i just drive people away. THEY DIDNT DO ANYTHING AND I STILL OVERREACTED?!? Its your fault all of this happened Min. Theres no point in trying to gather their forgiveness, they have forgiven you one to many times, you deserve death. Yet i miss them, but its my fault everything happened, its my fault im alone, its my fault im alone again. But i hate being alone, i want someone to talk to, i wanna speak to people, but i cant do that anymore because of MY incapability to hold in my emotions and have a talk about them instead of ghosting, blocking, ignoring, and all of that stupid stuff! Thats a problem Sora, your emotions are something you need to learn how to control! But i just cant learn, i cant learn anything. Im stupid and annoying, just like everyone tells me i am, im fat, ugly, stupid, annoying, and i should just shut up. But i cant, the only escapes i have from this world atp are Murder Drones and PJSK. I spend all my time on my phone because it helps me not have an emotional breakdown due to my trauma. But im just overreacting, its not that serious, you arent a victim of Mental/Emotional 4buse she just wants best for you. Yeah, mother does know best i guess. So tell me, if my mother knew best, Why would she yell at me and tell me everything is my fault when i havent even done anything, why does she always go drinking, why does she never listen to me nor my siblings, why doesnt she never try to speak with us, why does she yell at me when i have never done anything, why is she the reason my oldest sibling left to go move in to college, why is she always giving all her love and attention to everything that isnt her children, especially her boyfriends. And why wasnt she there for me when she needed to protect me, to help me, to guide me, and why was she always getting new boyfriends/husbands every single day, why didnt she tell me nor my siblings that her and her fiancee got married and why did it happen 2 times?
