Breaking into His Heart

 I step out of the old, rusted cab with sigh as my eyes show me my new home, in Hickory Hill, Connecticut.  The Victorian house is a baby blue, with soft green vines snaking up the outer walls, the crisp paint slightly curling away. Way to keep up the image, Dad, I laugh. Taking a deep breath I heft my pack over my shoulder, my scrawny arms having trouble with the large bag.

            Before I head to the door I remember the cab driver, I turn and offer the driver a twenty, he accepts with a grunt before hastily stuffing it in the pocket of his greasy, white v-neck and taking off, but not before burning out and leaving the putrid stench of burned rubber. “ Well if that’s how you feel about it then.” I mutter to the gray smoke in the air.

            I walk up the concrete stairs towards the screen door with white floral framing; Mom would’ve loved it, I think to myself. I scan the yard, just about as straggly as the outside of the house, uncut and dead. I shake my head and chuckle. Never one for yard work, I guess. Once at the door I quickly ring the doorbell. I hear an old chime echo throughout the old house, then the clatter of feet scuffling towards the door.

            The door swings open with a creek of disapproval “ Amber! Come inside!”  My dad is standing at the door, his slightly unshaved face counter against his smoothed-back and perfect black hair. There’s not much I can say I get from him, other than my thick black hair. As far as looks, his strong jaw line, thick eyebrows, and his sparkling green eyes weren’t really a part of my image.

Upon seeing his excited grin I can’t help but smile as I step in the door.  He wraps me in a giant bear hug. I hug back as much as possible while trying to drop my bag. “ Hey Dad.” Not much excitement emerges in my voice.

            I haven’t seen him in what seems like forever, since when I was about 8, now my 17th birthday is around the corner. I hold him tightly and take in his woodsy scent, which the house also seems to smell like, along with the whole town. That’s all it is. Woods.  I can almost barf in disgust.

This thought brings yet another sigh, why of all places would he live in the woods? I’m a city girl, used to stores everywhere, restaurants, and clean and kempt roads. All that’s in site is a super-store, a family diner, and dirt drives. How am I supposed to get used to that? Meh.

He releases me and pats me on the back awkwardly. “ It’s nice to see you, Am. I’ll take you to your room… I guess.” He bends down to grab my bag before heading up a crunched stairway next to the open-kitchen.

            This is going to be so awkward, I mean, he’s my dad and all, but come on, I haven’t seen him in what, 11 years? Heck, even that hug was a little awkward. But then again, we’re both pretty much loners, I think I’ll live. But it wasn’t going to be the same.

Finally I take notice of the inside of the house; it’s warm fireplace, wooden floors, and a cozy kitchen. I think I like it here, although none of the decorations correspond, it’s small for my taste, the animal heads on the wall, and there’s that woodsy smell, its kind of cute. I smile to myself and stumble up the stairs after Dad.

When I come to my room I’m actually pretty happy with it. The walls are a light blue, almost identical to the outside of the house, but brighter, airier? My bed is black with white floral accents. The walls have some old black and white posters, and some old pictures of me.

            “ So, you like it?” Dad asks, a glint in his eyes.

            “ You kidding? I love it!” I smile. As a kid I would’ve jumped in his arms and celebrated, but we’re too far apart for that now. I grimace.

            He doesn’t notice. “ I hoped you’d like it, blue used to be your favorite color.” His arms are crossed now and he seems genuinely proud of his efforts.

            “ Still is.” I say, my lips forming a line. Awkwardness: check. I just didn’t know how to carry a conversation with him like I used to.

            “ Uh, well, I’ll just leave it to you then.” He says, turning and walking downstairs. I was thankful his statement didn’t require a response.

I unpack my clothes and put them in drawers before lying down. I check my messages.

Alex

Babe, text me back.

Alex

I’m sorry Amber! You have to believe me!

Alex

K whatever. Don’t text me back.

            I deleted the messages swiftly. I feel the tears sting in my eyes. I swallow them “ What. A douche.” I mutter. Bored, I decide to head downstairs.

I see Dad standing in front of the couch, “ All the way! All the way!” I snort and roll my eyes. Men and their football.

“ Did you just snort at me?” He turns, sheepishly.

“ Maybe.” I laugh, grinning. “ Got anything to eat around here?”

He walks to the freezer and opens it to somewhere near a million boxes of microwave dinners. My eyes bulge.

“ Holy mother of deliciousness.” Life: complete. Anyone who knows Amber Lochs knows she’s in love with microwave dinners. Unhealthy as they are, they’re my kryptonite.

Dad playfully punches my in the arm, “ You’re just like me kid, just like me.” He chuckles before heading back to the game.

Slightly stunned at his sudden playfulness and social skills, I grab one and toss it in the microwave. Upon finishing I grab utensils and go back to my room.

After taking a shower and brushing my teeth I pad into bed and get comfortable. Just as I’m about to doze off, I hear a knock at the door.

“Am, don’t forget, you have school in the morning. You get to be two hours late since it’s your first day, but I figured it’s still a little early for you. So be up at 9, sound good?”

“ Absolutely stupendous.” I mutter, eyes still closed. His footsteps get quieter and quieter until I drift off to sleep.